#it's a beautiful name but also immediately makes me think of the spider whenever i hear it

[iwasbored777]

Is there any chance that Miles and Gwen on Earth-8 named their daughter "Charlotte" bc of that book "Charlotte's Web" about a spider and since their baby is their little "spider" they chose that name? Cuz it sounds like something these two would do

[aimedis]

gavin & freelancer headcanons ♂🎀

"you're my sky, deviant.. the space between my stars..."

gavin and freelancer are nonsense by sabrina carpenter

gavin and freelancer go on walks every so often and pick flowers to put in each other’s hair and they giggle like little kids 

sometimes when freelancer does anything gavin finds remotely cute, he just softly kisses all over their face.

gavin never fails to fluster freelancer by flirting with them

however, for an incubus, gavin gets flustered quite easily. freelancer ruffles his hair and kisses the tip of his nose? he's blushing. freelancer tells him he's beautiful? he's blushing. freelancer laughs a little too hard at a joke he made? he's fucking blushing

they get insufferable if they’re not around each other for more than a day

they can have little conversations without actually saying anything, just by making little faces at each other (damien sees them do it all the time and he's so confused)

freelancer likes wrapping their fingers around gavin’s pinkie (when they’re on dates, at home, in bed, while hanging out with the gang etc.) and gavin thinks it’s cute as hell

whenever freelancer feels uncomfortable or hurt by anything, they almost never say anything about it. they just ignore whatever it was by laughing and move on

gavin can tell (because he's a demon but also because he's just that observant with them) and stops what he's doing immediately to figure out what's wrong

caelum likes asking freelancer about gavin because of the smile that overtakes their face when talking about him

gavin feels like a part of him is missing when freelancer is gone for too long (and immediately returns to normal after they return) ((damn squad witnessed how bored he was the entire two days they were away once and the second he saw them again, he was all smiles))

freelancer also gets really down whenever gavin is away from them for too long (dear deadass thought they were depressed the first time they witnessed it but gavin hugged them once and they were back to normal)

freelancer and gavin have necklaces with the other’s initial/name on it 

sometimes gavin lays awake at night just staring lovingly at freelancer while they sleep, admiring how far they’ve come and how he got so lucky with them (canon)

freelancer’s hand is always on gavin’s chest (when they’re cuddling, tapping him to get his attention, pushing him away when he’s being annoying or just touching and feeling up on it)

gavin is a clingy baby when he’s half asleep and freelancer always laughs at him

freelancer is also really clingy when they're tired and gavin makes fun of them too

gavin is scared of spiders (i believe that many demons are scared of bugs) and freelancer has to kill them

"grown ass demon scared of a little bug, everyone"

they bully each other lovingly all the time

freelancer never fucking drinks water, gavin always has to remind them

freelancer is always in gavin's lap

the crew always jokes that they "wish someone would look at me the way gavin looks at freelancer" (he looks at them with heart eyes i swear)

i will never stop thinking about how many people's lives were saved because freelancer and gavin love each other that much

gavin is always trying to distract freelancer from studying or doing their homework (he hides their textbook) 

gavin and freelancer both take any opportunity to slap/fondle the other’s ass

freelancer has a habit of saying "is it casual?" whenever gavin kisses or does something romantic for/to them and gavin hates it so much because it is very much not casual

they argue every once in a while, mostly small pet peeves (such as gavin leaving his shoes everywhere, freelancer's lack of self-care, just getting annoyed with each other) that escalate into bigger fights

they usually resolve them quickly just by talking because the both of them are excellent communicators

they don't ever yell at each other when they're angry

however, freelancer gets very petty when they're mad and they can stay mad for a while. so even when they're no longer fighting with him, they can stay angry (pouty) for like an hour

gavin doesn't mind, he knows they're not really upset and he takes the opportunity to tease them

sometimes gavin scolds freelancer for not caring about their health or their personal needs. he does it very gently while rubbing their back or massaging some part of their body and without sounding like a parent. freelancer pouts the entire time but they try to listen to him i was in such a specific mood when i wrote this oh my god

both of them get babied by the other when one is having a bad day (or even just for no reason)

freelancer bakes for gavin whenever he's upset or stressed. gavin loves eating freelancer's desserts

freelancer loves teaching gavin children's hand games (like rock paper scissors, patty cake etc.) and they have a handshake

the first time gavin witnessed afab!freelancer on their period, he genuinely thought they were going to die

freelancer isn't allowed to say "it's because you hate me and want me to die" even as a joke (because gavin will get upset, he takes their mortality so seriously)

whenever freelancer laughs, gavin stops just to stare at them with the fondest look in his eyes

freelancer calls gavin a lovesick puppy. gavin wears the name with pride

gavin's eyes glow pink ever so slightly whenever he talks to or thinks about freelancer

freelancer gets irritated quite easily and doesn't even realize it sometimes. gavin finds it funny and just nudges them a little to whisper, "you're so mad right now"

they make out at least three times a day

everytime they're in the pool at damien and huxley's house, they're kissing away in a corner because "he's so sexy with water all of over his body" (the crew is so tired of them)

they're borderline codependent (not in an unhealthy way), freelancer comes home early from classes all the time because they miss gavin

gavin gives freelancer anything they want. if they want snacks or an item or need something fixed, he has it done before they can even finish the sentence. they mention something once and suddenly there's twenty of them on the counter

no matter how many times he does this, freelancer is still surprised

gavin has all of freelancer's favourite songs memorized because they're always singing around him

freelancer forgets they have magic sometimes and asks gavin to grab things for them. gavin taps their head lightly to demonstrate their psychokinesis for a while until they go "oh" and laugh

freelancer says "i love you" for everything, they use it almost as sentence filler

they are both such homebodies (when gavin's not looking for some poor soul to fluster)

gavin helps freelancer dye their hair all the time

freelancer says gavin's name a hundred times a day (he counted) ((it's because they 'gavin' like 10 times at once to get his attention))

it's worse on text (they spam his name)

freelancer used to s3lf-h4rm and they relapsed right after the inversion. gavin always found them and cleaned them up while reassuring them he wasn't mad and they deserved to heal

they feel so comfortable and safe with each other, they don't ever hide their struggles/relapses. always seek the other out for help and comfort

they go on double dates with damien and huxley all the time

freelancer loves making gavin try their favourite foods

gavin loves telling freelancer they're funny

[hana-no-seiiki]

YANDERE! BATFAM W/ MILES MORALES (BUT GENDER NEUTRAL) ! READER

[ PART ONE ] [ PART THREE ]

GENERAL CW/TW: Spoilers for Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse. Typical Yandere themes of stalking, violence and whatnot.

PART CW/TW: Reader gets called a beauty (beauty/beautiful is gender neutral fite me).

EXTRA: also uh mind you most of my knowledge on the boys come from reading fics so if i get any of my info wrong feel free to correct me

current status: unedited

summary: reader gets into multiverse related hi-jinx and almost gets their ass broken if it weren’t for a tired, definitely sleep deprived senior catching them. (it’s tim you guys)

Reply if you’d like to be added to the taglist!

WHAT’S UP DANGER

(PART TWO)

“I like tall buildings so I can leap off of ‘em,

I go hard wit’ it no matter how dark it is.”

Turns out being a hero is hard skill to learn. Especially if you were working on a time limit.

You had recently gained the ability to uh- well you didn’t know what exactly. All you knew is that somehow you were at least 5x as strong as you were before and a lot more sticky.

Not to mention your senses were all over the place.

It’s like you could see, hear, smell and feel everything.

You didn’t really want to avoid Damian, but whenever you came across him — or just went within his immediate vicinity. Your “tingles” and enhanced “senses” would flare up and make you dizzy.

Usually it’d only be that bad when there were projectiles or insects around you. You surmised it was probably your powers warning you of the dangers he may potentially bring. Whether it’d be from himself (the heir must have some sort of self defense skills) or his name (you didn’t want to think of the target you’ve put on your back both in school and life in general by being his acquaintance. Jesus [Y/N]. Being distracted by your future and planned failure in academics doesn’t excuse letting that happen. Stupid.).

You were mostly stumbling around with your strange set of abilities until you met this girl named Gwen.

First of all, she was just — incredibly pretty. You couldn’t but just stare at her sometimes and—

Getting back on track — !

After getting some spidey sense feedback loop and ripping off a massive chunk of her hair. You find out that you’re this universe’s “Spiderman.”

And that she, was from another universe entirely.

Even a big sci-fi junkie like you had to doubt her words, but as she showcased her abilities you pretty much went on your knees and begged her to teach you.

The both of you get to work quickly. Investigating how she got to your universe and practicing the use of your powers.

The first part went really well. You even met a few other dimension traveling spider-people (and animal) along the way. After sneaking into a lab, you found out that it was a rich man’s, King Pin, “bring his family back project” that brought you all together. But that his actions were probably going to destroy the fabric of reality if he kept going.

The second part, not so much. Your stickiness was something you just couldn’t control.

Luckily it was winter break and that prevented you from ripping another schoolmate’s hair off.

Your “universe specific” abilities, as the other spider-people called it, like invisibility and bio-electricity only came out at random. Sometimes at the most inconvenient times.

Your webbing abilities were subpar to say the least. Many attempts led to you breaking several bones.

Praise super-regeneration and all

But f u c k did it still hurt.

and it was during one of those web-swinging practice sessions when you fall into the arms of Tim Drake.

Tim was just trying to get some fresh air.

After passing out on duty last night and having to deal with Damian suddenly abandoning his missions for some reason. He decided that maybe it was time for a break.

He didn’t exactly expect to have a young adult falling into his arms during said break.

He was just talking a casual stroll really. In a relatively quiet part of Gotham, he didn’t expect much to be happening much less a pretty/handsome giving him a small wave as they sheepishly laugh at their . . . strange encounter.

“ Hey. ” You smiled at him. Praying to all that is holy that he doesn’t notice the bits of undissolved webs you have littered across your hoodie. Thank goodness you didn’t wear your makeshift mask today. He was going to think you were even more of a weirdo than you already are!

“ Hey. ” Tim replied. Praying to all that is holy that you don’t notice his heart rate picking up and his ears turning red. It was the cold he swears! The cold!

“What’s a beauty like you doing around in a place like this?”

They both ask in sync with completely awkward delivery to boot.

Taglist: @vanessa-boo @w31rdg1rl

[ PART THREE ]

[kobblefort]

Hoistedworked: Origins

Alright, okay, yeah. Back on the wagon, right here in the woods. It's still plenty remote, cold enough to teach a Dwarf to speak in clicks, and it is actually capable of sustaining life. Sure it's no glacier but the glacier was always a shitty idea. We can at least carve something out here. Like some ideas are actually just bad. Like too bad to manage. This one though is basically fine. We can do this.

See? Look at this shit, it's beautiful. Plants. Trees. Actual solid ground. Since I never introduced the actual decapods before, let's pretend these are all just the same guys, okay? Just for convenience's sake.

Cikuti Worthoars, who likes bobbit worms for their knobs and angles. Oh yeah and suddenly the snow cleared up. Don't ask me, I don't know why.

Cutichi Strengthtown, AWESOME name. He likes to eat seahorse meat and loves two-grain wheat beer.

Chetek Boattrussed, who likes kangaroos for their pouches. 🤔

Cukikuki Townriddle. Big fan of eating giant Brown Recluse spiders, even though she hates cave spiders. I'm not going to ask.

Scukikik Denttongs. Big beak dog fan.

Retuti Livingwheel, groundhog fan and mead drinker. Wonder if we can actually get a bee colony set up here.

And finally Cikuki Prisoncrafts, goat eater. Well, please forgive me if I kind of breeze past the "starter base setup" phase here.

Or, well, I would, but... nobody wants to work. That's not some boomerism, nobody will just pick up the tools to chop wood or dig holes. They gather plants fine, and took apart the wagon without any trouble, but now they're just... gawking...

Reading about it on Reddit, it seems the solution is to just retire the fort and then immediately un-retire it. So we'll try that I guess.

come on... come on... YES!!

We don't even make it all the way down 10 stories before discovering the cavern this time. And before you ask:

yep, fucked up normal grass again. Whatever. It's not as big of a deal this time. One day I really ought to properly ask how that even happens, but for now, I'm just rolling with it.

Up above, all that happened in the two weeks the game makes you wait whenever you start fortress mode again is that the crabs spilled all their prickleberry wine. What a tragedy!

After about a season, we've got a pretty nice setup coming together. All the stockpiles are hidden away under the big main meeting area, the aquifer drains into a cistern, things that rot are kept safely away from the average crab's path, and walls are being built up top to make a more secure entrance. We've eaten a boar and silky sea slug while food stocks were low, and the giant leopard we brought with us "went missing" some time ago - which probably just means it's dead. Giant raccoons have been harrassing us up on the surface, but that's the point of setting up our defenses. It's a much more auspicious start than our first expedition, and with self-sufficiency actually taken care of, we'll be able to get our paper economy and library off the ground sooner than later. We've also found a bit of native platinum quite high up in the earth, but once you start the metal economy, it feels like you just sort of become a metal economy fortress. So we'll hold off on that for now. Also, the giant wolves keep wandering into our meeting hall. Don't worry, they're ours, but they'd probably suit us better outside fending off the raccoons... Oh, and nobody has bedrooms yet. Nobody's too pressed about that, though. One time a really drunk guy came over to my house and when I said "alright that's it for the night" he was like for sure, peace out, slapped my hand, fistbumped me, grabbed his things and walked 5 steps out the front door to fall asleep sitting up on the stairwell of my apartment. So people can do that, people can just sleep on stairs. My roommates found him and were like "what the fuck" and I was also like "what the fuck" because I figured he'd just go home. I think they just let him sleep though. I would've heard it if he fell down the stairs and he didn't. So you can do that.

There's not a lot to say right now. We're not making a ton of money, but we're sustaining ourselves fine.

Defenses are coming together fine, too. Our giant wolves had pups and the pups have the zoomies. It's wonderful.

There's a quantum stockpile now to make woodworking a lot easier. For those not in the know, a "quantum stockpile" is a 1x1 stockpile that gets filled by having a minecart dump into it. The cart races down from the surface, and is just long enough that it doesn't crash at the end, though also just too long to auto-dump - so instead, the solution is to make whoever finishes filling the cart hop in and ride it down so that they can push it the last couple tiles. Or at least, that's the plan; at first crabs just kicked the cart down the ramp, but since I changed it to be ridden instead, everyone's been too busy putting a ceiling over the main "courtyard."

Here's our "administrative wing": counter-clockwise from the top, it houses our expedition leader Worthoars, production supervisor Boattrussed, and sheriff Channeledchain. We've got a hospital set up earlier than we need it for once, but nobody's been appointed chief of medicine yet. I ultimately had to run DFhack drain-aquifer just because the "mist generator" started overflowing, but I've set up "ponds" where any crab with nothing better to do will chuck a bucket of water down from the top of the stairs. The result is the same, so it should cheer everyone up. They'll need it, since...

Roofing the main area has everyone caught in a snowstorm, and though nobody's particularly miserable at all, it's still dragging some crabs down. Oh, and I like this.

Efficiency be damned, I wanted a cool bedroom setup, and looking down into the great hall right when you wake up seems pretty cool to me.

An agitated giant raccoon attacks, but it's put down pretty quickly by the giant wolves. The bigger threat is our own lack of forethought.

I wanted to put grates up above the farm plot there, because I'm not actually sure whether you still need outdoor plants to get sunlight and rain or whatever, or if a tile that was directly exposed to the sun at any point just counts as "outdoors" forever. I honestly think it's the latter but you know what they say about eggs and baskets and all that type of shit.

The problem is that crabs kept trying to put floors down on these tiles, which was possible because they could walk over the grates to reach them, but didn't register to the game as structurally sound, so the floor just instantly collapsed every time they tried to do it. Well, at least nobody died.

Except for just now. I tried to make the quantum stockpile also include rocks, and it worked! But people keep walking out in front of it and getting hit. Somehow, a shrimp survived just fine, but this metalsmith fucking died. It seems obvious to like, not walk on minecart tracks, especially if they're set to the "no" traffic setting, but it's apparently not. A bit of judicious wall use seems to fix it, though. We also make probably the ugliest fucking graveyard I've EVER set up.

Right off to the side of our main noble quarters for whenever we either get a mayor, get elevated to a barony, or whatever else, I just made... I don't know. This spaghetti nightmare. I don't care. If crabs were dying in battle, then you know, I'd take it serious, I'd make a big whole thing out of it or at least plop down the quickfort windmills. But what am I supposed to feel about a guy bashing himself with the fucking minecart? Like... you get what you paid for. And now the next poor saps to die in this fortress get what you paid for too.

Our first artifact is created! Its name translates to "Slippants." Ok. It just has an image of a decapod in it. Not even any particular kind of decapod in specific. But it instantly makes Hailcloistered, or jesus christ how am I supposed to remember this, Ricikikikitikik into a legendary armorsmith. Which is, you know, cool. Yeah, we could probably get some armor going. I neglected to mention I set up a metalsmithing business; I didn't want to, but there are so many metalsmiths in this fortress that they started a guild, and I always wanted to try actually placing workshops in a guild-relevant area instead of just having all the workshops in one place and guild halls somewhere else, so it's a little inefficient, but it looks cool, so who cares.

...and that right there is the last thing I wrote before I stopped playing for 8 months.

I feel like the reveal was always coming: "I was just doing this as a weird cry for help cloaked dick-deep in 69 layers of irony." Like on the surface it looks like it is just a person freaking out but then one layer lower it's actually just a guy fucking around but one more layer it's freaking out again and on and on and on. I don't know what to say besides that. I'm in the first really healthy relationship of my life and trying not to mess it up. I'm still soul-crushingly poor with no real skills or job prospects. I do still play the greatest simulation game of all time Dwarf Fortress, though much more rarely - I often boot it up with big ambitions to make some Content for The Tube, actually, but I'm simply too good at the game, so nothing interesting happens in my forts, and I end up with twenty gigabytes of footage and ten pages scribbled in a notebook covering six years of fortress management where the most interesting thing that happens is like, I set up a milling industry.

I'm not really interested in Daarunbay Detevay anymore, I'm sorry. It's not like I've deleted it, I keep pretty extensive backups of all my worlds and saves for the greatest simulation game of all time Dwarf Fortress, even though I rarely actually use them, so it's not really going anywhere. If there's any interest I could probably like, put the world folder on pixeldrain or mediafire or whatever and try to compile a mod list, but I'm not making any promises and I doubt anyone really wants that very bad anyway.

...and that right there is the last thing I wrote before I forgot about this draft for 2 months.

In that time, the Adventure Mode beta appeared. I stayed up all night waiting for it to come out, but it was still rough enough that I didn't dive all the way in just yet. However, I realized something after playing as a cockatiel man who got viciously killed for starting random fights with innocent dwarves in my own half-abandoned fortress which went to hell because apparently the AI lets all of the animals out of cages and unlocks all the doors when you retire a fort. There might still be much more to do in Daarunbay Detevay. Rat World may be doomed but there's no reason we couldn't make a party of Rat Bandits. Better yet we could embark from Rushsly on the mission of a lifetime: to kill Vakeek Malignreasons.

So I don't know. Maybe we're going to do that. Maybe I will actually make some YouTube Content and I'll never reveal there that I was the Kobblefort guy but you could see a video and recognize my loquacious schizotypal affect, and you'd be like "dude, aren't you the guy who did Kobblefort?" and I wouldn't respond or maybe I'd be like "what is that" but you'd know. You'd know it was me. But just for the record please don't go around asking Dwarf Fortress YouTubers if they're the Kobblefort guy. Because either they don't know and you have exposed a YouTube person (much more normal than Tumblr people, on the whole) to Kobblefort or you have put me on the spot. So yeah, just forget you ever read any of this, except for during the time where you're reading it. I'm trying to do the exact opposite of "death of the author" here. This is "death of the reader." No that sounds fucked up. This is "life of the author." Sure. See you soon

[spidercrusadersworld]

i don't know what this is but i just need to write this down and show people.

summary

peter B Parker (Mayas unofficial found father figure) finds Maya passed out beside a standing desk, where she does her research and learns about her sleeping patterns. the link leads to the exact color of green i imagine her bus being painted. also i'm tagging @pokers-ocs @kaidacresto @i-put-the-wit-in-dimwit and @persialiu because i want feedback! i have no fucking clue how to wright and I did this in one sitting but I want to know what you think!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was helping Miguel scope out new spiders to recruit when we eventually landed on Maya, I was able to see her life and, it was hard to watch. this poor kid has been through hell, and all on her own too. so when I watched Miguel manipulate her into joining, I saw just how lonely she was, and just how desperate she was to have someone to talk to, and yet how terrified she was to open up.

but somehow, I gained her trust. it started with a hello, she said hi, and reluctantly kept up surface level small talk with me . she's very nice, just incredibly nervous.

I made an effort to keep up appearances, and one day, when she saw me with mayday, a part of her she usually kept hidden bubbled to the surface. a genuine desire to actually talk. i guess she finally saw that not everyone there was a loner. or maybe she just likes kids. but what i really think it was, is a desire for innocence. maybe, she thought if i could bring that to the table, bring her, into the world, i was someone she could trust.

so soon after that, she would come to me, make the first move, and the more she would talk, the more comfortable she would be around not just me, but everyone.

so when today, she didn't show up at the society, i called and texted, something she would usually respond to immediately, but there was nothing, and i was worried, the day before, i had told her that i was involved in her recruitment and was there when Miguel looked into her past. and she said "well i assumed something like that would have happened, seeing as whenever I recruit someone, I'm given all the information about their past. I knew Miguel was involved obviously, but usually the info is passed down to someone else, and then to me, so clearly theirs more than one person involved, I've wondered, who else here knew about me, so honestly, if anyone in the entire society could have seen... my past... i'm glad it was you..."

'What if I had lost her trust, what if shes avoiding me, I probably hurt her feelings, I have to go apologize!' I decide to go over to her dimension to say sorry, when I arrive, i'm in a deep part of a forest, with the biggest trees I've ever seen, i"m talking at least twice as big as the empire state building, its foggy, and fireflies and moss carpets completely engulf the area, it's gorgeous, and i let myself be lost in fantastical wonder for a little while when I finally snap out of it.

i see a shape through to mist that has light coming through it, i come closer to it and i find that it's an old school bus, obviously renovated into a cozy living space, painted a nice soft earthy of green. the moss roots and vines spiral around the bus, this thing has been here a while, and it's not leaving any time soon, it looks like the magical spirit of the woods has claimed it for itself, giving it the blessing of it's beauty.

i walk over to the side of the entrance, and thats where i see it; two grave stones. well large rocks with names crudely etched into them. one covered in flowers and pictures, the other with a lanyard draped across it, the one with all the flowers reads Jade Maverick, the name on it etched much more neatly on it, below the name it reads i'm sorry. my heart breaks in a million pieces at the makeshift burial, i know who this is.. Mayas fiance, the one she lost in the explosion, i saw the accident when we where looking at her past to see how to recruit her, but to see this, it's different.

the other stone is more weathered and cracked, obviously less care has been taken in maintaining it. if any. This one reads Maya Maverick. For a second I'm confused, but then I remember, Maya survived the explosion, but she never told anyone. to the rest of the world, Maya Maverick is presumed dead. I look at the lanyard on the rock, and it has her old ID badge from Alchemax clipped on it.she looks so young, and happy, and somehow, more innocent. her hair is different, and she's wearing glasses, though only half the picture remains intact, the other burned, presumably, in the explosion.

the atmosphere is no longer pleasant as i look at this scene, the fog making the grave sight feel somber and cold. I look back at the bus, and I no longer see the once cozy looking hideaway i first saw, It now looks desolate and lonely, a place of grief and solitude, a place to wallow in what once was, and, as i see the M+J carved over the entrance, surrounded in a heart; a place of what could have been but was stolen.

I want to leave this place, it feels wrong. I can't believe I just flipped through this part of her life like a damn power-point presentation, taking notes like it was some sort of fucked up character study! this is so personal, I feel like I completely violated her space... she lives here alone, no wonder she is so closed of, this.. this must be terrible.

I finally realize I have heard nothing from inside the bus, not a sound. and now i am concerned, is she okay? I hesitate on opening the door, I feel like I have violated something so personal, it feels wrong to enter, i fear like I've already seen to much that was not for my eyes too see. should I really be entering her living space? what if shes completely fine and I only make things worse?

As I turn away i see something in the corner of my eye, through the window of the bus door, I see a hand lying limp on the floor. and I go back and enter the bus, concerned. when i go in I see her lying limp on the ground, a cup of coffee split on the ground, shattered just a few feet away. beside her is a standing desk with a computer open, and notes scattered across it, and pined on a wall, I start to piece together, what I sincerely hope, was what happened here. but it can wait, i go to Maya and try to shake her awake.

"maya?, MAYA! come on kido, wake up and talk to me!"

but she doesent, I try for a long while longer and decide that I need to get her someplace safe, where she at the very least won't wake up alone and confused. so I open a portal to me and MJ's house.

I step through it and MJ walks in happily.

"honey your home early, what's the occa-" she trails of at the sight of me carrying Maya. "whats going on?" she asks, now concerned.

"MJ, meet Maya, the girl i've been telling you about".

she looks at her concerned "is she okay?" she asks nervously

I explain to her what happened, and how she seems to be fine, just exhausted beyond belief, and in an extremely deep sleep because of it.

"is it okay if she stays here tonight, I.. I couldn't just leave her there alone, and, I.. I need to know if shes okay. please, I'm ... I'm worried about her"

she looks at me sympathetically and puts her palm against my cheek, I lean into it, tired.

"alway thinking of everyone but yourself peter" she says lovingly.

"well I'm afraid that might be her problem exactly, I promise it will just be for a ni-" she cuts me off before I can finish.

"that wasn't a no! of course she can stay Pete, she can stay here as long as she needs" she says kissing me softly on the cheek.

"you really are incredible" I tell her

"not as incredible as you; caring about someone like this, that's something only my Peter Parker can do." she says, "I'll go get the couch ready for her, wait one second while i make it comfortable for our guest." she says, leaving to get the blankets.

Looking down at Maya, asleep in my arms I realize I do care, I care a lot actually, I wonder if she's met miles yet, she reminds me of him. I want to protect her, in a a way that's different than how i want to protect miles, or anyone else really. she's just been through so much, all I want is for to wake up so that I can tell her it's all okay. she doesn't though, and I I don't think she will for a while.

I put her down gently on the couch i try to let go but her grip sub consciously tightens on my arm, and she tosses around a little, but eventually, exhausts herself and goes limp again, her chest rising and falling gently. my room is right across from her and I leave the door open so that i can see her. I lie down and after a lot of worrying, I eventually fall asleep myself.

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mayas pov

I feel myself wake up, but not wanting to, it's warm and confortable and I'm extremely drowsy.

that feeling lasts for about two seconds when I realize that I fell asleep in the first place and I panic a little at first, and then a lot when i realize three things.

A: I don't know how i got here.

B: Here is comfortable but it's definitely NOT my bed.

and maybe the most concerning;

C: holy shit. someone else is here and i definitely don't have my mask on.

I quickly bolt up and web up the closest moving object, my vision freaking the fuck out trying to adjust to the sudden intake of bright light, leaving my eyes completely useless on figuring out what the fuck is actually happening

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH ME?!" I demand.

whoever is there calls for someone but my senses are so overwhelmed i don't quite catch who.

another blob runs in from another room and i try to web them up but they doge and web me up instead.

wait, hold up. if someone else is webbing me up, that means it's another spider, which means I should probably stop freaking out and wait till I can actually read the room and see what the hell is happening, before I hurt someone.

my senses slowly come back and I hear someone talking to me, and referring to me by name.

"....aya, .... alm dow... It's Oka... your Okay, It's me peter."

I blink a few times and my vision calms down and i can see whats happening, and it is infact peter.

the panic, anxiety and adrenaline completely drains out of my body when I see him. I realize in that moment, I actually trust peter. it's odd, but it's comforting, and it's welcome, so I guess that is thing that happened.

"peter?" I say, letting my voice crack with emotion, for the first time in years, not even caring on how pathetic i sound.

"hey kiddo sorry about that It, well, it didn't feel right leaving you on the cold hard floor, are you okay? do you need anything?" he said.

on the floor? wait.

"did I fall asleep?" I ask

"yeah, you did".

I feel dread bubbling up inside of me. "nonononon NO" I scream, tears building up, "wha- what happened is everyone okay?" I stammer.

peter seems confused. "kid no one is hurt, except maybe you, i'm worried, how.. how often do you sleep" he asks me.

I stay there, and I think really hard, and finally I say"

"I usually pass out after... five days, but I.. I try to avoid it for as long as possible"

Peter looks at me as if I had just died in front of him. I don't know why.

"kid..." he starts. "you gotta let yourself sleep,what do you do at night?" he asks

that when I realize that my sleep schedule is not a normal one that spiders have.

"I- I go out on patrol, don't... don't you?" I ask, nervous.

"oh my god kid, you.., you need to sleep." he says.

i'm confused. "but what about everyone else, I can't sleep if someone needs my help!"

peter approaches me, and does something unexpected,

he hugs me...

and I don't know what to do...

the last person who hugged me was... her.

my knees buckle, he catches me and hugs tighter...

and that's when I start to cry.

"Maya, you can't do that to yourself.." he says

In the back of my mind I know, I know hes right, I always did, but I couldn't.

"you can't help anyone if you don't take care of yourself" he says

"I.. I can't, It's too hard" I admit, sobbing into his shoulder.

peter is silent for a while, "then let us help" he says.

I pull away, confused. "what?" I ask.

"say here with us, and we can help" he says looking at me with caring eyes. "Mayday would like the company, she really likes you y'a know, and, well.." he looks over at a woman, who I assume is MJ, across the room who gives him an approving nod, and back to me "I guess me an MJ can tolerate you for a little." he says teasingly.

"Yes" i sob out.

"well while your here could you release our breakfast? I think it's ready to talk" he jokes.

I look over and realize that the closest moving thing that I webbed up after waking up, was one of MJ's pancakes in mid-flip.

I laugh, and cry at the same time, and for the first time in years, I have a family.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[zukuist]

𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞

200 followers special

includes: multiple characters (would add more tags but.. i reached 30 ;;)

your name is shortened to y/n, they/them pronouns

notes: thank you for 200 followers! this isn’t really going to be that long, but im just doing the characters i really like so ;; ALSO I MIGHT’VE GOTTEN KIRI’S ENTRY A LITTLE WRONG so ugh sorry ;;

—

shouto todoroki

— THE OBSERVANT SIMP

from the start, he’s quite oblivious to certain things, (social ques, signs of romantic interest, etc.)

but when he’s observant with someone, then that totally means you’re special to him. does he realize how much he pays attention to you? hmm.. maybe?

he’s going to be the first one that notices you’re hungry, even if you don’t realize it yourself. he’s quick to grab a snack and break it open to you

same thing with being thirsty— if he notices that your water bottle is empty, he’ll quickly find the nearest vending machine and buy a bottle.

temperature is also no problem. he can immediately tell whenever someone’s cold; but he usually helps you first

too hot? he’s slowly putting down the room’s temperature

too cold? his left palm starts emitting some sort of heat in your direction, hoping it creates some sort of aid

if your shoelaces are undone, and/or he notices that there’s a button undone on your shirt— he’ll fix it for you

will ask to take your pictures on dates, and he’ll also help you pick out the best photo (not that any photo of you is short of any beauty)

in short— people will notice that he’s actually a big simp for you; because of how observant he is with you specifically.

katsuki bakugou

— THE TSUNDERE SIMP

just because he’s simping for you doesn’t mean he’ll treat you any differently. bakugou will be bakugou, and you eventually learn how to adapt to that.

but even so, his simp habits slip out sometimes.

when he’s cooking, he’ll accidentally make too much to eat, and he’ll coincidentally put the extras in another box and hand it to you

he’s a good student, even with studies. but would he say he’s a good teacher? hm. probably not

but if he notices you need help, he’ll sigh, feining annoyance as he decides to tutor y’all, because those ‘idiots’ are hopeless

rolls his eyes when he sees food on your cheek, but he’ll grab a tissue and wipe it off for you— claiming how you’re so messy.

he’ll act like he hates hearing your ‘annoying ass singing’ but he’ll lean against the doorway and listen to you rock out to whatever song you’re singing to.

denki will call him a simp for looking after you, and bakugou will just yell at him to “SHUT UP” >:T

he secretly likes taking care of you. his words aren’t the softest thing in the world, but his actions make up to it.

izuku midoriya

— THE DETAILED SIMP

as katsuki bakugou would call him; he is a nerd

he definitely meant that as an insult, but his input on detail makes it very useful in things like relationships

he remembers every detail of your quirk, your limits, potential secret moves.

it would’ve been stalker-ish, if it weren’t for the fact that deku does this out of admiration for his s/o

so if you so happen to collapse due to overusing your quirk— deku has a detailed plan on what to do. it’s almost scary.

he puts detail in a lot of things, anniversary gifts, birthday gifts, and so on.

deku’s also the type to plan things weeks before it actually happens. like.. planning out the perfect birthday gift

and with this, his memory is really good. so it’s very unlikely that he’ll just suddenly forget anniversaries and birthdays.

i hc deku as a bad cook, so he eats takeout food more than his homemade food

but he’s takes note of your allergies, your dislikes with food— and he finds himself mumbling small details to recall what you like

when you walk out in pretty/good outfits for dates

his face will break out into shades of red— suddenly rambling all the good details of your outfit, complimenting you while he’s at it

“y/n’s looks fantastic as always. i might die from their beauty”

if anyone calls him a simp, he’ll be really embarrassed about it. “me? a s-simp? is that a bad thing?”

just tell him it’s fine.

denki kaminari

— THE HYPEMAN SIMP

a big simp

like.. really big

he worships the ground you step on, and hypes up everything you do

y’all know when irene from red velvet literally breathed in north korea, and the crowd just

*claps*

yeah, that’s denki to you

it’s so blantly obvious that he’s simping over someone, and everyone’s just kinda used to it at this point

he’s just a big fanboy sometimes

whenever you’re sparring with someone, he’s always in the background like

“go s/o!!” 🤩

and he has tendencies to go a little easy on you like.. what’s he gonna do when you get electricuted??

but that doesn’t mean he’s never serious— nah.

there are times where he’s just a little bashful just being in your presence

sneaking glances your way, as he silently fanboys about you in general.

“s/o looks really good today. they always look good but !!”

when y’all weren’t together, the bakusquad was just tired of the constant romantic pining

it was really obvious that he was simping back then, and they’re not so sure as to how you didn’t say anything about it

mina always called him a simp

so yeah!! it was a big relief when you got together with him. he never makes you feel terrible, because he’s always your #1 hypeman.

eijirou kirishima

— THE HELPING SIMP (rip idk what to call this)

i didn’t really know what kinda name i went for this one but let me carry on

kiri upfront is very confident, and friendly. he never shows a mean side to anyone,

and there are rare cases of him being bashful

he’s kinda almost like a golden retriever? since he’s always nice and friendly to everyone

but then when you enter the room; he suddenly goes quiet, and he’s left alone with his rather loud thoughts about you

he didn’t really know how to properly approach you at first

but him being kiri, he’s still rather friendly to you (for now)

when he’s messing around, practically sharing one braincell with kami and sero

and then you suddenly walk in— he snaps out of his foolishness, and greet you with his very warm smile

“hey y/n!” he waves at you, and he hopes you don’t mention the teasing look on both kami and sero’s face

sometimes when he’s doing his close combat training, and he notices that he’s getting too close to you

he’ll be like “woah man, maybe we should move locations.” bc he doesn’t wanna hit you by accident ;;

kirishima prefers to not stand near you when his hair is all spiky. like he’s never conscious about it, until he’s around you

man poked sero with his hair before, and he doesn’t want to do that to you

kiri always looks at your hand, just to see if it’s occupied with something. his thoughts linger to what your hand might feel like

“their hand looks really.. soft. argh! i shouldn’t be thinking about these kind of things in public! im sorry y/n”

bakugou really only notices kirishima’s simping ways

bakugou always mentions the fact that kirishima goes really silent whenever you’re around—

and he’s secretly contemplating on having you around more so he can just shut up 。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。

moving aside all of that, kiri always carries your things.

you’ll beg him to give you at least one thing, and he’ll say no because it’s “not manly to let someone carry all of this.”

if you’re sad, he’s the first one to cheer you up— reassuring you that everything will be okay.

kiri’s just wants to be at your service at all times! it’s manly to help people, right?

hitoshi shinsou

— THE DISCREET SIMP

no one would be able to tell that he’s simping for someone

because unlike kaminari; he’s not like IM HITOSHI SHINSO AND IM ACTUALLY A SIMP

he’s a lot more discreet, and no one has really caught on, besides you and kaminari of course

he’s a lot less sarcastic with you, asking you about anything that’s happened instead of just being there

he prefers it to hear you talk. the way each word and syllable rolls off your tongue smoothly, and the way you use your hands to emphasize things

he’s amused.

oh and the way he looks at you? almost any normal person can sense the simp in him pop out (he’s so contained though)

he’s definitely the person that’ll get rid of any bug that’s terrifying you— even though he’d normally just leave it to them

he’ll do it, regardless if it’s the biggest fucking spider he’s ever seen, or the smallest spider

he’ll do it to make you feel safe.

he has these random spurs of compliments during the day

the source mainly comes from his staring habit

and they’re just so unexpected and out of the blue. hitoshi’s amused whenever he sees your reaction to his compliments

like.. you could be really frustrated about something, and he’ll just go “your eyes are pretty.” that’s his discreet method tO MAKE YOU TEMPORARILY DISTRACTED FROM THE ISSUE—

call him a simp, whatever. it’s true anyway so he doesn’t why should he be ashamed of it?

he’s discreet about it, since it’s your business and his business. but you can definitely feel his feelings loud and clear

neito monoma

— THE 180 SIMP

“i’m not a simp!”

[you enter the room]

*nervous laughter*

he had his last laugh, and he never thought he’d be this soft around someone.

especially if you’re from class 1-A like.. i became the thing i hated, ugh.

relentless teasing is amped but this is his way of making sure you remember him loud and clear

but he’ll never tease you in a condescending way— like how he torments the rest of class 1-A

that’s reserved for them 💅

always compliments you, that’s the first thing he does when he sees you—

and they’re never generic compliments either

“it’s nice to see you here, y/n! you make the world better day by day!”

“i’m still wondering what you’re doing in class 1-A, you’re much better than them!”

everyone secretly wonders how you got monoma to like you

monoma canonically likes pastels. spread the word

so sometimes, you’ll walk over to your desk— and you’ll just see this random pastel ornament sitting on your desk

you know who it’s from

whenever monoma starts becoming annoying, kendo will definitely use you as a weapon to make him shut up

he’ll be laughing at the expression on his face, thinking he’s absolutely winning at this

but the smile is wiped off his face when he hears “ok go on, i’ll tell y/n about your antics.”

“no, no! i’ll behave now, please don’t tell y/n.”

class 1-b literally use you as blackmail whenever monoma acts up, and it’s because of how different he is around you

like.. his personality takes a 180, (besides the obvious teasing) it’s alarming

—

©️zukuist 2021, bnha|mha belongs to horikoshi kohei. do not repost my work❕

[forsworned]

[♥] accidental kiss   {giyuu tomioka x reader}

Genre: Slight Angst, Slight Fluff 

Categories: F/M

Relationships: Giyuu Tomioka/Reader

Word count: 1,171

a/n: requests are open

➽────────────── ────────────── ──────────── ❥ 

Sunlight filtered through the blinds and lay perfectly on his form as he snoozed away. The only sound was the soft rhythm of his breathing. It was three in the afternoon and Giyuu had still not woken up since he got back from his mission two days ago. Not like you were worried or anything. Hashira usually bounced back in about three days and he didn’t suffer any major complications, but his body was definitely telling him to rest.

A faint sigh left your lips as you gazed at the sleeping beauty. One could not easily not be awestruck by him. He was captivating in not only his forms but also his quiet and graceful mannerisms. Well, you could mostly speak for yourself but you were sure others thought just as highly of Giyuu as you did.

You watched as his chest rose and fall in a continuous pattern, not missing one breath. 

Good. His breathing is back to normal. 

That’s something you found yourself doing whenever Giyuu came back unconscious from a mission. Observing his breathing and making certain it wasn’t irregular. You’re not sure why you picked up the habit. Well, you did know. Watching him sleep was almost kind of addicting. Not in a creepy stalker kind of way, but because everything Giyuu did was elegant, refined and sharp. 

He could always tell when someone was watching him, and he has definitely caught you several times when you let your gaze linger a little too long. Embarrassing to say the least, but this was the only time you could freely observe without his knowledge.

A sudden intrusive thought passed through your head and couldn’t help but blush at it as you peered down at him. 

Kiss his cheek.

Oh, hell no. Your cheeks were tinted rose with plight. How could you think that? That’s way too embarrassing. But what if—

No, no, no! 

What if he woke up right before you did it? How would you even explain that? That you were checking for spiders? That’s just way too risky. You shook your head and started to gather your things, but your mind just couldn’t get release the idea.

Your heart wanted to throw caution to the wind and say “fuck it”, but your brain said “fuck no.” Hard to fight with that logic.

Your eyebrows scrunched in a contemplative manner before deciding to go with your heart. What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

Bending forward, you could feel his warm breath fan against your lips as you got closer to his perfect visage. And as your tips of lips began to graze his cheek, Giyuu shifted his face so that instead you met his lips.

Giyuu’s eyes fluttered open and yours were wide with shock. You pulled away immediately and his face contorted in chagrin. His cheeks a bright shade of vermillion and for a moment you guys didn’t speak, didn’t  breathe, didn’t even move an inch.

”D-did you just kiss me?” He stammered. You clamped your mouth shut and chewed nervously on lip.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

There was a moment of silence before you decided to speak up. His eyes gave you the largest sense of unease. As he should! You just kissed him without permission for crying out loud!

”Y-yes.” You looked down not able to meet his gaze any longer. You wanted to run. Far, far away and never look back. How could you be so stupid.

Giyuu lifted a finger to his lips as if confirming that you indeed did kiss him. He felt the outline of your lips against his. It seemed as if the remnants of it did not want to leave just yet.

“I’ll just,”You began to say as you got up. “leave now.”

Giyuu sighed. “Don’t.”

Shocked with his lack of anger or usual dismissive behavior, you stood there unable to move your feet.

”Why.” You whispered. Why would he want you to stay after that. Oh, right he was probably going to give you a verbal lashing. Not like he has. Actually, now that you think of it, Giyuu never raised his voice at you or said anything passive aggressive. His tongue never spat venom like it did others when addressing you. It was always kind and soft.

”Because,” He began. He tugged at your sleeve, and you rotated your head to face him. His eyes were tender and warm and a sliver of a smile was creeping up on his lips.

“I want you to stay.”

His hand caressed the apple of your cheek as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. Your heart was practically jumping out of your chest as you examined his expression. It was so much more gentle and loving. A side of Giyuu you’d never seen before. The tip of his thumb tracing your bottom lip and before you knew it his lips had met yours once again. You felt a surge of warmth rush to your cheeks and you had to remind yourself to breathe.

He drew his lips away from yours and met your eyes again. You had to be dreaming. There was no way this was real life. His smile even bigger now as he caught a glimpse of your expression. 

“You kissed me.” You murmured breathlessly.

His hand reached out to pick a piece of lint off your hair and tossed it away. “Yes, I did.”

You were speechless. The look on your face must have been quite hilarious because Giyuu let out the most hearty laugh. You’d never seen him laugh like that and it made him look so soft and vulnerable. The way you’d always had wanted to see him. Your mein soothed at the sight of seeing Giyuu enjoy himself.

”Oh, and you think that’s funny?” You finally spoke.

Giyuu’s laughter halted but the smile on his face was still bright and lively. “Yes, I do. You should’ve seen the look on your face. It was so cute.”

Just when you thought you were done being absolutely flustered for the day it happened again. “C-cute?”

He gazed down at you with the same gentle expression from before as he placed his hand over your head. 

“Yes, [name].” He pressed his head against yours. “You are incredibly cute.” 

Oh, he’s done it now. Your heart felt like it imploded in that very instant. Giyuu not only kissed you, but he called you cute?! You really hit the jackpot.

Just then the door opened with an abnormal force making the both of you jump back. A bushel of bright blonde hair had entered the room and you visibly sulked.

“GUUUUUYSSS GIYUU IS AWAKE!”

A wave of bodies entered the room one after another and you could barely make sense of what was going on. Some tending and others parading around him with excitement. Giyuu shot you a guilty look and you began to get up from your seat. But as you did, Giyuu whispered into your ear:

“Come see me later tonight.”

[dreamrecorder]

Ok so- idk if you’ve seen demon slayer;; but there’s this episode (it was during the spider fambam arc) aNywaYs- so like. Rui yeets ties* (i guess-) Nezuko like. Up in the air. With his weird spider thread jazz— and like. It’s sHarP weird spider thread jazz— so she’s like. Yknow. Being sliced and diced with string— but it kindaaa reminds me of like. Xiao. And his like.... weird... sad.... uh. Karma. Thing. Like y’know where he’s like hanging from his arms- red stuff. Yeah. So like. Now for the actual request

Xiao’s s/o (female if you don’t mind;;) gets kidnapped by like— the fatui or smth. And they tie her up like Nezuko :D to be like “lol haha Xiao be all like-” and she’s just. Like. Dying. Slowly. Dripping b l o o d and yknow. All the tea. And Xiao comes to rescue her— and he’s like 0-0 “wait...” and he realizes that’s like- exactly what happens to him- and so. He beats the fatui’s butts saves his s/o, anddddd she like.

Idk. This is where I need your angst expertise ❤️ like- she could d i e. In his arms. And poor Xiao would be so scarred omg poor thing- BUT THE ANGST- but at the same time;;;; the f l u f f of him being able to save her just in time and she was like fighting for him the whole time or whatever and ended up needing him to save her anyways- and then Xiao feeding her almond tofu until she gets better ❤️❤️❤️

IM SORRY THAT WAS SO LONG- im probably going crazy from lack of sleep from reading fics for too long sndndnsnsj

But if you do this,,, BLESS YOUR SOUL I HOPE TO EITHER BALL MY EYES OUT OR SQUEAL FROM THE WHOLESOMENESS-

Anyways.... thank you! Have a stellar day~ ✨❤️

The heart yearns and the wind heard

lmao this ask is so adorable i hope you’d enjoy this ksks

anyway, full Angst train up ahead but there are moments of Fluff too. There are mentions of blood and violence if those are not your thing- dont worry guys, this goes with a happy ending cos you and Xiao deserve one~ on a final note- non canon compliant and suuuuuuper long- like- legit this is very long

The Yaksha sighs.

He’s here again. His mind and heart has returned his being into this crimson world his demons have created within him.

He feels it. He feels the corruption binding him tighter again for every death he brings by his tainted hands.

He looks at his bindings. And ever so slowly, the red and black coiling around his person will eventually reach his heart.

One day, he thinks, all this crimson and black in this world will swallow him whole and he will see the light no more.

Xiao sighs again.

This is his karmic debt.

~

The moment you stepped foot within Wangshu Inn, you knew he was in his prison again. After giving a quick greeting to the inn keeper, you hastily went to Xiao’s room. The closer you got, the heavier the atmosphere became.

You reached his door and knocked softly. As expected, no reply as he continues to struggle to take back his control over himself. Without hesitation, you stepped in. To anyone else, they would have instantly met his spear at their throats, but with you, this doesn’t happen. Instead, you see him crouched on the wooden floor with a hand on his chest. His knuckles were white and his breathing was ragged. His amber eyes- lost. Observing his form, yes… his moments of corruption are becoming progressively worse.

With swift steps of familiarity to this routine, you went to him and grasped his shoulders.

“Xiao, it’s me…” You whispered with clarity. And oh- how your voice brought a wave of comfort to his soul.

“N-name…” His voice cracked, but him calling to you is always a good sign.

You gave him a small smile and proceeded to grasp his hands together with yours. After which, you then leaned your forehead to his to chant your prayers. As your prayers progressed, slowly but surely, the corruption begins to fade along with the black mist that covered him. However, you took note how this ritual took longer than the last.

Once everything is done, Xiao just slumped onto your shoulders, still breathing deeply. “How are you feeling?” It was a useless question you asked every time this happens, but you always, always, have to make sure.

Usually, he would mutter a small ‘fine,’ but now- words seemed to have left his mind and all he could muster was an almost-unnoticeable shrug.

Truth be told- his response disheartened you, but you did not show it. Instead, you opted to simply encase him in your arms and caress his hair. After all, these are just one of the few, rare moments Xiao would leave himself into your care. Xiao is aware, himself, that his state has been becoming worse and worse. And you both know, that a day would come when he would just attack anyone- friend or foe- without a trace of hesitation. So, just this time- he speaks his feelings.

“Name?”

You answered immediately with a questioning hum.

“What would you do… when I finally lose control over myself?”

It was very subtle, but he felt how your hand stopped caressing his hair for a second, then proceeded to the previous task at hand again. In all honestly, you can never find yourself having an answer to that question. “And why would I ever let that happen to you?” You questioned back, fully aware that you were dodging his question.

Silence surrounded the two of you, unsure on what to do with the sudden heavier atmosphere.

Not wanting to face the cruelty of the world yet, Xiao simply buried himself on the crook of your neck even more. And despite the ghostly sensation of his lips on your skin, you could feel him mouth the words ‘I love you.’

“As long as I’m here,” you whispered, “nothing can hurt you.” And that was the most beautiful lie that the Yaksha has heard, but he was willing to believe all the same.

~

When word about Fatui diplomats starting a bank reached you, there was a nagging feeling in your head that trouble would bring itself present anytime soon. It was like an itch that wouldn’t get away. And the only way to have that itch gone is to scratch it.

“You are absolutely a fool.” Xiao stated darkly with crossed arms, for once disagreeing with the plans of his master.

“We can never know what their intentions are unless we let them start their bank, no?” Zhongli said as he gazed at the marsh spread beneath him.

The Yaksha only scoffed but said no more.

Building up your courage, you deemed it was your turn to voice out your thoughts, “Um… Rex Lapis, I see your point, but wouldn’t it be best to resolve the problem before it persists into something larger? We all know- All of Teyvat knows, that the Fatui are not to be trusted.”

Your archon offered you a kind smile, “I understand your worries, Name. However, as of the moment, they have not presented themselves as such. If they truly are our enemies, then it would be beneficial for us to know their intentions.”

You frowned deeply at his statement. Seeing you do so, somehow, your archon immediately identified your main concern.

“Is this about the Tianquan assigning you to be her representative for the Fatui?”

The moment those words left his mouth, a growl tore from Xiao’s throat, but he held his tongue.

“Did Ganyu tell you?”

The Archon nodded and you sighed.

“I volunteered, actually.”

And at that point, Xiao vanished into thin hair, but you could still his sense his presence around.

“May I know why?” Zhongli questioned gently.

For a moment, you struggled for words. You didn’t know how to describe this ���itch’ to him. “At first, it was supposed to be Ganyu, since in the Tianquan’s eyes- Ganyu is an adeptus and she does not know that I am, too. Perhaps she didn’t want to put me in harm’s way, a ‘visionless human’ at the side of a harbinger. After some convincing to Ningguang for my volunteering, I spoke to Ganyu next.

“The adepti are divine beings that walk here in Liyue. I had this feeling that putting a divine next to a power-hungry harbinger would become an issue. I told Ganyu that, since I looked ‘harmless’ and ‘ordinary,’ the harbinger’s interest about the divine would never surface.”

A stretch of silence wrapped around them as Zhongli pondered over your words. “Perhaps, are you also planning to dig out the truth of their arrival?”

You nodded, “I knew you would allow them to stay, so I just took it upon myself to unfurl their secrets.”

“Hmmm… I grant you permission on doing this. However, should trouble arise, do not hesitate to tell us.”

~

The glare pointed at you was strong. Even without him saying a single word, you could hear his phantom voice in your head speak with such coldness, What are you thinking?

You simply gave him a reassuring smile, “I’ll be fine, Xiao. I may be a human in mortal eyes, but please do remember that I am also an adeptus, no matter how weak I am.”

Xiao releases a huff, but still sits by your side at the floor of the balcony, letting the moon kiss his skin. “You’re not weak.” He mumbled as he snaked his hand to yours.

To him, you will never be weak. In fact, you were the strongest being he has ever laid his eyes on. Not physically, no. It was you mental and emotional fortitude. Back during the Archon War, he always admired how you kept your head held up high no matter the suffering you have experienced. No matter how much death surrounded you, you still fought. And that strength made you a survivor. During the war, you never failed to help the wounded. Even when someone dies under your care, you held strong for the departed and for those who are left behind. You were a pillar of hope.

He brings your hand to his lips and kisses every knuckle “… Just be careful. If ever you are in trouble do not-“

“Hesitate to call your name.” You finished, beaming at his words.

~

As someone who used to be a healer and a doctor, you were quite familiar with several mild skin diseases that mortals can suffer from.

If there is an itch, you do not scratch it- for you will only aggravate the area even more.

Now that you’re working alongside the Fatui as the Tianquan’s representative, the itch you kept feeling was only irritated more. Especially whenever you spoke with the Harbinger who goes by the name Childe. And since your work requires you to cooperate with him, you also don’t miss the chance to discover what he hides, should the opportunity presents itself.

Childe… his azure eyes certainly have their… charm to those unaware. However, you knew better. You know he’s capable of drowning you just by his eyes. While he may be a cheerful man, his eyes lack the lustre of joy. The eyes are the windows of the soul, yes? If so, all you see is an unending ocean that you do not want to swim in. The surface may be calm, but the deep is relentless. However, duty bound you are- deep within the ocean, you shall find the secrets the Fatui hides.

Again, another scratch to the itch, but it only irritates you more.

~ 

The news of Rex Lapis’s death became the catalyst of you confronting the Harbinger. From Yujeng Terrace all the way to Northland Bank, you ran (with Ningguang’s permission of course). Before you can even open the door to his office, something caught your eye.

It’s faint, but you’re an adeptus. You sensed elemental traces, just smack bang at the middle of the door. You carefully scrutinized the tracings, and fortunately you knew Snezhnayan script. And what you read only made your heart sink.

It’s ready.

With the adeptal arts, you managed to uncover the origins of these elemental tracings.

Scratch.

Without hesitation, you followed these tracings until it led you into some ruins.

Scratch.

Following the tracings further, you find yourself in a dimly lit room. Wary, you summoned your weapon imbued with your element.

Scratch.

Searching the room, you came across several antique boxes. You opened them.

Scratch.

What you saw were familiar. Too familiar. Dimming the room more with your element, you find more Sigils of Permission hanging on the walls and on the ceilings. The energy within them were faint, but with enough numbers, it’s enough to kill a-

“Well, well well, I thought you’d be there mourning for your Archon. But here you are, snooping around someone else’s research material.”

The sound of his voice made you sharply turn your head to him, your stance now more offensive. “What are you planning?” You bit coldly.

The Harbinger hummed a small tune, “Nothing much… But! If you’re really curious, I guess I could tell you.” He hummed some more but you knew he’s not finished. Once he finished his tune, he grinned to you menacingly and the depths in his eyes became even deeper and darker, “After all, I won’t let you leave this place with you knowing my secret~”

~

There was this one time, Xiao struggled against himself so much, he scratched himself red so that he could anchor himself back to the real world. You remembered how much you cried as he slept in your arms. You never wanted to see him do that again. Seeing him hurt himself also hurt you, too. It was like a stab in the heart, then a twist, and twist some more. A slap in the reality that you might lose him one day.

As he slept, you solemnly observed the wounds he sustained himself to. They were angry red, just like blood.

Now, you, yourself scratched that itch in your head too much into a wound for blood to seep through. You scratched too much and now you have to bleed from it.

~

You were slipping in and out of consciousness. Sleep was tempting you more and more but you know you have to wake up. You were aware that this is going on for days.

Everything hurts. You remembered how his blades, imbued with the Sigils, weakened you thoroughly. Every slash he brought to your body just drained the energy away from you. But still you had to do something.

He wanted an adeptus- he wanted an adeptus in order for the Sigils to grow stronger both in number and in power.

Now here you are, bound by chains and suspended at the middle of this empty room. These chains were adorned by talismans that drained away your energy. You were bleeding from your wounds of your previous battle.

Drip. Drip. Drip goes the blood and pools on the ground underneath you. The ground, you barely noticed, was lined by Liyuean script which enacts the ritual of the Sigils draining your divine power from your blood.

To the eyes of a sadist- you were a picture perfect in a canvas. A dark room lined by the damned Sigils, glowing an eerie gold. Then there's you with your bloodied clothes and chains. The red pool underneath was casting a red glow on your way, giving you a red shade to your pale skin.

Everything hurts-

And everything was driving you mad.

You can also feel the Overlord of the Vortex feed from your energy through the Sigils. You sensed his lust for power and revenge. You felt his anger and the corruption within him. You felt his hatred and his want to bring death. For days that felt like years, you’ve been battling against that very same god in your head. This battle was not something you shall not lose to and failure is not an option. If you fail here, then Liyue will fall. 

This god- he was driving you mad slowly.

If ever you are in trouble, do not hesitate to call my-

You shut the thought from your head. You are not going to call him. You will not speak of him. You will not think of him. You will not call him. Not to this place where his corruption will grow. No. You Will Not Call Him.

If it means that me not calling you will keep you safe from the corrupted remnant of a god- so be it. 

Please

However, no matter how much you denied yourself to call his name, no matter how much your heart yearns to be with him- the wind does not ignore the pained sob that left your lips.

~

Ever since the news of Rex Lapis's death and the visit of the Traveler with a Sigil in his hand- the corruption within him just bloomed into something feral.

The Sigil- there was something wrong about it but Xiao doesn't know what is it that is wrong. Then there's you- where are you? Surely with the news of their Archon's death- it would send you to bring forth a meeting for the adepti to talk this over. But now- for days- you remain not by his side.

With you missing- the demons inside him are slowly taking control over him, taking advantage of his vulnerability for you. For each passing day, it was slow torture for him- The worry bubbling in him was consuming him. He glared at the Sigil between his fingers and not failing to notice how his dark aura covers him once more. 

“Traveler,” Xiao called sharply, “What is it you intend to do next?” 

To any mere mortal, the look his eyes held were enough to strike fear, but the Traveler stealed themselves- meeting the adeptus’s gaze with an equally serious calm. “I have my suspicions on a certain harbinger and I-”

“Where?” The Yaksha growled.

“In the Golden House.”

Without a word nor warning, Xiao placed a hand on the Traveler’s shoulder and teleported them to the place where the Exuvia is hidden.

To the Traveler, everything happened so quickly as one event led to another. One moment, they were standing among unconscious bodies of the Millelith then the next thing they knew a corrupted and demonic gust of wind flew them away to the side. Regaining back their vision, they could see Alatus’s spear now at Tartaglia’s barrier made of Sigils. 

Alatus narrowed his eyes at the floating talismans and began to calculate the flow of this incoming battle with precision and accuracy despite his losing control over himself. 

It was a tense minute of sizing each other up, but eventually, Tartaglia has broken the silence with his annoying innocent voice. 

“Who would have thought that I’d have the honor of fighting another adeptus of Liyue?” 

The question immediately fed the corruption within him, the dark aura exploding at it. He knew that he should not believe in the Harbinger’s words so easily, but the glint in the latter’s eyes held truth. You could be out there, hurting, scared, alone. You could be out there, bleeding out. You could be out there dyi-

His aura exploded once more at the thoughts spreading in his being. With a burst of unspeakable power, Alatus lifted his weapon and pierced the barrier once more, this time breaking it without failure. At the threat, Tartaglia backed away as he donned his mask.

In a similar fashion, Alatus, too donned his mask. “I will ask you once,” the Conqueror of Demons spoke with a deathly calm, “Where is she?”

~

He should have killed him then and there. But the call of the Overlord of the Vortex must not be ignored as it threatens Liyue. 

In the small opportunity of escape, Childe took it. But he was weak and injured as Alatus swiftly threw his spear to block his way and teleported right in front of him. In a show of power, the Conqueror of Demons lifted the mortal by the neck.

“I will ask you again, where is she?”

In fear, Childe told him everything and at his every word, Xiao listened carefully- never speaking once. But the anger within his heart, it boils- it rages. His amber eyes bored into Childe’s soul- thinking what he should do to this mortal. Oh how killing him would be so nice. However, when the Yaksha’s gaze landed on the regal form of the Exuvia, he merely threw the mortal in its way.

“Killing you would have been easier. However, the crimes you have presented against Liyue are not mine for me to judge.

I leave the Harbinger to you... Rex Lapis.”

Once out of the Golden House, the Overlord roared once more, shaking the lands of the nation. However, along with it, he heard the faintest of voices. I’m so sorry... I couldn’t hold him back anymore. 

Only then did the demons in his heart freely took control of him. Just like the stories of old, where the Yaksha walks, death follows. But they were no stories. In his way towards the ruins where you were held captive, every step he took brought carnage and even more death and blood to taint his hands. No Fatui will leave this place alive. The very being of destruction ended many lives. Each death, the demons were growing stronger.

All he wanted now was to kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill killkillkill killkill kill killkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkill

Then seeing you suspended in the ceiling and bound by chains. Blood was painted on your lifeless skin. Wounds were littered and bruises were blooming on your form. But most of all, your eyes. What were once full of life and hope- now empty and blank. His demons quieted down.

Broken. You were like a broken porcelain doll.

“N-name...” His voice cracked, not believing it all.

With haste, he quickly broke your binds and caught you in his arms. he was fast to check for your pulse and your breathing. And thank the Archons, you were breathing but barely. You were now walking the line between life and death. With all his might yet a gentle caress, he hugged you for dear life. “Name... It’s me...”

But still, your eyes still held no recognition and it shattered his heart to pieces. With further inspection, he sensed the presence within you. A corruption. A certain evil. 

“Name, stay with me please,” Xiao begged with desperation as he fought back tears. “It’s me who supposed to be the corrupted one between us, not you... I’m not allowing you to leave me, you hear me-”

With a ritual of the adeptal arts, he started purging and purifying the evil left by the god who fed from you. He is not letting you stay alone in your prison, not for a second longer. 

Xiao prays and he never prayed before. Even to his master. But just this once, He prays with desperation. You are the light in his darkness. You are the moon in his night. 

The ritual was a delicate process. For every word he spoke, he was rewarded by your screams of pain and the writhing of your fragile body. He wanted to stop, but he can’t. He had to physically restrain you from trying to escape from his embrace and from hurting yourself. And for every cry you released, Xiao merely shuts his eyes clos just for him not to see your pained eyes. Every now and then, Xiao speaks gentle apologies and words of encouragement for you. You were coming back. But still, the evil persists.

You writhed and scratched against him, until you were creating more wounds for blood to seep through. When it came to a point, you began pleading and begging for him to stop, that was when Xiao had shed a tear. So he continues the ritual, his prayers, and his apologies. They were arriving to a point where the ritual is reaching its conclusion but your screams only grew louder.

Please, just a little more...

Please, just stop...

Please...

The corruption disintegrated away from you in a forceful release of dark energy. He was breathing deeply, attempting to calm his loud heart. When he placed his gaze on you, you were breathing rapidly and your eyes were searching blindly and your hands were desperately holding onto him.

“X-Xiao...” You whispered, “Where am I? Where are you?”

With a sigh of relief, the Yaksha hugged you again closer and his forehead to yours, fearing you would go away again. The action made you lift your hands to his face, still searching blindly.

“I’m here, Name... I’m here.” At his voice, the dam in your eyes broke as you cried silently. Xiao was not adept in emotions, but for you, he will face them gladly. He lets you cry as he gives you soft whispers of assurance, safety, love, and promises. However, you were not crying because of what had happened to you. You were crying for him. After experiencing such corruption-

You sobbed some more- you were this close to him losing you and you could not bring yourself to imagine if your roles were reversed.

“P-please,” you said with a broken voice, “please don’t go to the place where I can’t follow...’

The words, at first puzzled him, but after a few moments, he realized and once more it broke his heart. Bringing you closer, Xiao let loose the tears he was holding back. With a gentleness unexpected of the Conqueror, he simply littered your face with kisses. “I promise if only you would do the same.”

With your smile that he loved dearly for so long you too spoke your promise, “I do.” They were simply two words, but the comfort they bring into the Yaksha’s heart was in volumes.

After that, you shared a few tender moments in each other’s arms. Simply relishing the feeling of their familiar warmth. A little later, Xiao spoke, “Would you like to eat some Almond Tofu once we get home?”

The question made you giggle at his innocence, so you agreed. Despite you needing physical medical attention. But Almond Tofu with him? Yes, you two definitely need some emotional healing.

A/N: fINALLY dONE lmao this was supposed to be short but angst really makes me want to write longer everytime haha~ anyway this request really made me ponder bout genshin stuff with all the corruption this and corruption that but then a question popped up like-

how did childe replicate the sigil of permission? since sigils are imbued with divine energy, i just thought how did this guy accumulate so much sigils to the point of freeing Osial- a god!!! soooo i just played with the idea for a bit then figured out maybe these pieces of paper get the divine energy from a divine source right? and the adepti are divine beings of liyue and another thing- you guys might have noticed the change of names in some scenes- i dont know but i think somehow different names represents different side of a person like- we have childe the cheerful harbinger then tartaglia the power hungry harbinger- there’s Alatus who’s calculating and cold, there’s the Conqueror of Demons who’s ruthless and unforgiving, then Xiao who is calm and humane- lastlyyyyy i might post this in ao3 ksks

[slither-in-gryffindor]

Mystery Lover

Square Fill: Free Square

Warning/s: None

Word Count: 1,790

Summary: Darcy Lewis posted videos that the world cooed over, Natasha Romanoff being in love.

A/N: This fic was made cause I couldn't get the song out of my head 😂 and I also had an excuse to write a socmed au. It started out as a karaoke prompt and it just went from there 💁🏻‍♀️

Ao3

The team didn’t really plan anything that night. Everyone was in the common room lounging while the world is peaceful. Tony and Bruce was puzzling over an equation in a hologram. Thor, Steve, and Sam were exchanging stories at the couch. Clint and Natasha were rapidly exchanging knives while sitting at opposite ends of the room. And Pepper and Maria were signing documents at the coffee table.

“I am now here and the party has started! Up up up people, we’re going out!” Darcy’s voice echoed cheerfully as she sashayed into the room.

The brunette moved towards Maria, “Tall, dark, and handsome Director Hill. I would like to propose an outing that we all clearly need. It’s a Friday and we’re boring!”

“That’s your argument?” Maria asks amused.

“Well, I already have a bar in mind. It’s good but kind of hidden too and I already talked to the owner so we’re going to be the only one there. I also agreed that they could have pictures with you guys, but only if they post it after we leave.”

Maria chuckles. “You really thought this through. Okay.”

“I know it’s - wait okay? I just made you agree with me this is the best day of my life.” Darcy clutched at her chest and faked swooning. Jane just shook her head fondly at her friend’s antics.

The three women fondly watched Darcy as she puttered around and started gathering the others. “We’re going karaoke! Avengers Assemble!”

_____________________________________________________________________________________

It hasn't even been an hour, but the video was already viral. Hours after the Avengers left the bar, Darcy posted a video of them singing karaoke. Naturally, anything related to the Avengers goes viral, but the difference is that this is the first time the Black Widow made her appearance. And what an entrance she did.

The people had always been curious about the mysterious Avenger. They know who she is, and sees her attend events like the others, but pictures and interactions are scarce. So when they saw a video of her singing, and a love song at that, it blew up. Gossip blogs already have their choice of romantic interest, and even news feeds deemed her performance as news worthy.

The video started with a panoramic shot of the bar, and a rowdy applause came from the boys when a redhead swaggered to the stage. Natasha Romanoff looked at someone behind the camera and roguishly winked.

Whoops were heard when the familiar fast-paced notes sounded in the air. Her grip on the mic was confident and she let her body playfully move.

She bobbed her head. Eyes closed and feeling playful.

Making my way downtown Walking fast paces pass And I’m homebound 

The redhead’s mischievous gaze suddenly focused behind the camera.

Staring blankly ahead Just makin’ my way     I’m makin’ a way through the crowd    

And I need you. Natasha stretched her right arm forward.

And I miss you. She blew a kiss.

And now I wonder. The camera caught a hand darting forward and catching it. Just as Natasha smiled widely.

Darcy could be heard whispering an amazed, “oh my Thor they’re so cute!” and she swiveled the camera to take the others' reactions. Similar state of happiness and delight were seen as they cheer for their normally reserved friends.

An utterly soft smile was on Natasha’s face and everyone was just pushing and cheering because it’s the first time they saw that smile. Normally the couple would refrain from public displays of affection but they weren’t complaining. It was cute how the couple acts.

If I could fall into the sky Do you think time would pass me by Cause you know I’d walk a thousand miles If I could just see you… tonight.

The last line ended and everyone was still reeling, but the thundering hoots and applause followed immediately. Natasha bowed and smirked before strutting off the stage. The video cut, but not before catching the redhead smiling warmly at someone that the camera unfortunately didn't catch.

‘Cause you know I’d walk a thousand miles If I could just see you… tonight.

@darcygodtaser: If you’re as romantic as @n_romanoff, you can date me. But I think I’ll be waiting for a long time.

@muff_in: @n_romanoff oh my goddd what the fuck, I never thought someone's voice could make me melt into a puddle.

@bwcanrailme: can we talk about how @n_romanoff was totally singing for someone??? Can we have a hint who she's singing for @darcygodtaser

@redavengerlover: badass, avenger, and singer. Is there something @n_romanoff can't do?

@arrowbird: @redavengerlover @n_romanoff can't walk into corridors without bumping into walls when they smile at her.

@ironman3000: @redavengerlover @n_romanoff can't lift weights without dropping it on her foot because she saw them doing pull ups without a shirt.

@stevieamerica: @redavengerlover @n_romanoff can't walk properly on heels because she saw them in a tailored suit and tie.

@drgreen: @redavengerlover @n_romanoff can't stop smiling whenever she gets a good luck text from them

@thornir: @redavengerlover @n_romanoff THE LADY SPIDER SAW THEM IN ASGARDIAN ARMOR AND CANNOT SPEAK FOR 5 MINUTES

@itsbitsypuppy: I love how the avengers just exposed @n_romanoff that she's just like the rest of us mortals and gay panics too

@n_romanoff: Well I don't.

  _____________________________________________________________________________________                                                                                                      

                                                                                                                Another video was posted by Darcy and this one was even more viral than the previous one. And this time, everyone had absolutely gone wild. The speculations to whom the illustrious Black Widow was dating had finally been put to rest.

The revelation had sent everyone reeling. News feeds reported the event, and social media sites crashed due to the high amount of online traffic.

The video started with a beautiful view of a flower field. Purple, yellow, red, blue, you name it— there were 30 varieties of blooming tulips that filled the area. Behind the multitude of colors in the field is the extraordinarily green pine trees, and even farther is the snow-capped mountain — Mount Cheam.

An impressed whistle pierced the silent showcasing, and the camera flipped to show Darcy wearing a gray overcoat paired with a blue scarf.

“Beautiful right? But that’s not actually what we’re here for. We’re in Canada!”

“I don’t know where exactly but we were invited by our favorite blue-eyed commander because —” Darcy trailed off, lips pursing as she tried to remember.

Looking around, the brunette walked over to Steve, “Steve! Why are we here again? I can’t remember why.”

He scratched his head, “Pepper didn’t really give a reason. She just told us that Maria wanted us here.”

A voice off-camera caught their attention and Darcy looked straight at the lens, “Alright guys, that’s Pepper calling us.”

The team shuffled and stood at a distance, watching as Clint lead a blindfolded Natasha to the center of the field. He joined the rest and just sushed them when they saw Maria walking towards Natasha.

Excited murmurs came from the other Avengers.

“I think this is it.”

“You mean?”

“I think so.”

“Will we hear them?”

“Yeah, we set up a drone don’t worry about it. ”

A tall lean woman came into view and tapped Natasha on the shoulder, “Hey sweetheart, you can remove the blindfold now.”

Natasha looked around and the woman caught her hand to turn the redhead towards her, “Maria, our anniversary isn’t for a few months yet.”

Maria chuckled, and exhaled shakily, “I know. But that’s not why I’m doing this.”

She entwined the redhead’s hand in hers, “Nat. The first time we went here, we were just dating for a few months but I already knew we would last. Because when I look at you, I see a future with you by my side.”

Taking a deep breath, she put their entwined hands on her chest. Letting Natasha feel how fast her heart was beating. From the equally breathless look on the redhead's face, it looked like she already has an idea where this is going.

“Years have passed but it only cemented the fact that I want that future. So I’m standing here, in a field full of tulips because I’m deeply in love with you, Nat. And if you would let me, I’d like to love you for the rest of my life.”

“So…” Maria took out a jewelry box and got down on one knee, “Natasha Romanoff, will you marry me?”

Natasha was speechless. Staring wide-eyed at the kneeling woman.

Everybody held their breath, clutching each other in anticipation. Darcy was holding on to the phone so tight it shook.

An amazed, “Yes.”

“Yes?” Delight coated Maria’s voice.

Natasha let out a teary laugh, “Yes! Of course Masha!”

The video was no longer focused because Darcy jumped and hugged the others. Excited squeals and cheers erupted. Maria raised her hand to call them over. They ran towards the couple, hugging in celebration.

“This calls for a party!”

        _____________________________________________________________________________________

                                                                                                         Accompanying the video is a group photo of the team with the newly engaged couple. Clint, Tony, Steve, Thor and Bruce was at Natasha’s right, beaming proudly like brothers. On Maria’s left is Pepper, Darcy, and Jane looking at the camera with broad smiles. As for Natasha and Maria, they were smiling so widely their eyes were sparkling.

@darcygodtaser: Congratulations to our beloved spider @n_romanoff and commander @off_hill ! They’re perfect for each other. They’ve got to be the most romantic people I know. Trust me, I’ve dated before.

@tap_me: OH MY GOD @n_romanoff is getting hitched!!! And to a woman! I think I’m in wonderland. Her fiancée @off_hill is so romantic, and fucking gorgeous even from afar.

@gaymer: The gays win!!!! Fuck the people who told us @n_romanoff was dating a man. @off_hill and @n_romanoff are lucky to have each other. Congratulations!

@spiderlover: Who’s taking which surname? Natasha Hill? Maria Romanoff? Romanoff-Hill? Hill-Romanoff. I HAVE TO KNOW @n_romanoff @off_hill

@n_romanoff: @off_hill I think Mrs. Maria Romanoff-Hill has a nice ring to it.

@off_hill: @n_romanoff As long as you marry me I don’t care what surname you pick.

Laying on their bed and content, Natasha nipped Maria’s jaw, “Damn it Hill, I thought you’d argue with me.”

Maria looked down with a raised brow, “Do you want me to argue with you?”

She shrugged, “Not really, but this is why I’m marrying you, you keep me on my toes.”

“Of course I keep you on your toes, how would you kiss me otherwise.” Maria giggled at her own joke.

Maria’s laughter stopped Natasha from retaliating. She gazed at the commander and couldn’t help but smile. She’s going to marry this amazing woman. She couldn’t wait.

[britishassistant]

The Villainous Paranoiac Goes To Jail and Ninja Afterlife

Two innocent children get sent to Night Raven College

A set of scenarios about three of my ocs unwittingly trading places for two days, non-canon to any of my AUs

Swap 1:

Yuu—> Konohagakure

Yuu wakes up with a tantō to the throat.

Chie: Tell me where my daughter is and I’ll make your death quick

Yuu promptly freaks the fuck out

Through a combination of panicked yelling and tears the Prefect manages to convey to the Ketsugi that if there was a kidnapping, Yuu is both uninvolved and as much as of a victim as their precious daughter

Gai confirms that the strange teenager not only has no chakra, but clearly has little to no combat training despite his(?) athleticism, meaning Mayu-chan could easily overpower an assailant of this size, especially one this undernourished!

Yuu tries not to be offended and to avoid staring at Gai and Lee’s eyebrows they’re so big

Promptly shrieks when Kami!Sanji materializes to confirm that the Paranoiac had nothing to do with Mayu’s disappearance as far as the other gods can tell

Yuu becomes convinced that this place is the afterlife

The sad part is that Chie and Jirou can’t actually say much to the contrary, because??? Their daughter remembers dying before she came here?? Also there are active deities just floating around so.

Actually tears up at the homemade meals the Ketsugi provide

Before being sick as a dog later because food infused with chakra? Does not agree with a person without a chakra regulatory system

Surprisingly patient with Lee and any questions he has the purity of Jack and Deuce is strong in this one

Bit more long-suffering towards Naruto and his rendition of Wonderwall. Sunshine child too bright, introvert Yuu can’t handle it

Keeps writing down everything everyone says

This makes ANBU and ROOT very twitchy

The Paranoiac is quietly slated for “interview” at T&I the next day

Yuu crashes on the Ketsugi couch none the wiser

Mayu—> Nanba

Mayu wakes up to confused screaming and profanity.

It’s Hani.

It’s very rare for screaming not to be because of Hani

All he knows is one child was in this bed last night, and now’s there’s a different one dressed like it came straight out of Ninja Kamikaze???

Mayu for her part is both very alarmed to be waking up in a prison cell with two strange men and very glad she has her bokken with her

Kiji comes in to find his beautiful inmates being menaced by a twelve year old with a wooden sword

The twelve year old is winning

Once Mayu has ascertained that they aren’t enemy ninja and she’s somehow in her old world (?) she becomes much more cooperative with the guards

She’s very worried about how she’s going to get back to her family in Konoha

Also wondering if she should try to contact her former little brother Harp (who knows if she’ll ever get the chance again?)

These worries are not assuaged when the Warden informs her that there’s no records proving “Tamara Kaur” ever existed

For lack of any relations who they can contact to take the child off their hands, and because they have no idea how she successfully infiltrated the most secure prison in the world and replaced one of the inmates, the Warden decides to keep Mayu in Nanba’s holding cells until further notice

Guess who finds the samurai child while breaking out?

Nico, Uno, and Rock are amazed at the existence of a real live Japanese Samurai! With a katana and everything!!

Jyugo just asks straight out if Mayu’s an actor too

Mayu is very bemused by everything, but they seem friendly! The one with the mohawk likes food too!

Plus the blonde one is British! Just like she used to be!

Uno is very confused about how a twelve year old somehow lost her citizenship

Break Mayu out to get food together

They get caught the moment they set foot in the cafeteria and scolded very harshly

Mayu has trouble sleeping in a cell cot that night

Nana—> Night Raven College

Nana’s first instinct on waking up in a strange bed next to a monster is to assume he’s been kidnapped and attempt to subdue his captors

Which means Grim wakes up to an attempted smothering

The ghosts hear muffled screaming and rush in only to get salt and iron filings to the face. Nana actually has them all on the run when Crowley bursts in

Instantly becomes a confused and lost child in front of the headmaster and dorm heads

Only Grim and the ghosts know the truth, and their complaints are overlooked due to them “scaring the poor boy”

No one has any idea what to do with a thirteen year old magicless kid. It was hard enough with Yuu, and the Prefect was at least sixteen and could attend classes!

Nana adapts quickly to the idea of being in this new world— he’s just sad he couldn’t say goodbye to Kiji, Hani-senpai and Trois-senpai before leaving Nanba

Immediately resolves to leave NRC at the earliest possible convenience when he gets a good look at the Theory Wall— he can’t even read Japanese but that amount of crazy that it signifies always spells trouble

Is confused by all the pictures of Disney villains on the Theory Wall, but decides it’s not worth the trouble to ask about

Actually uses the beauty products Vil left for Yuu correctly

Gets semi-adopted into Pomefiore after asking Vil where the high quality products came from

Grim and the ghosts aren’t sorry to see the little brat go

Vil carts him around to test his potential in the performance arts

Epel tries to be a good senpai for the kid, and tells him he doesn’t have to just go along with Vil

Nana appreciates the effort, but does find this kind of thing more fun than being on his own he’s homesick for his cell

Rook enjoys seeing the child freeze up minutely whenever he asks about the prison attire and the large “7” tattoo on the back of the boy’s head

Nana likes Rook less and less with every pointed question the vice dorm leader makes

Can’t sleep in the big cushy Pomefiore bed and so curls up on the floor with a pillow instead

Swap 2:

Yuu—> Nanba

What why is Yuu in jail now

The prefect was supposed to be back home/in Ramshackle Dorm, why is Yuu in jail now—

Yuu is stressed and overdue for Grim snuggles

Paranoiac is also not thrilled about being stuck in Building Three— it’s like Pomefiore on steroids

At least Epel and Vil don’t steal and obsess over the underwear of their “fans”

Rook...the jury’s still out. But probably not. Probably

Maybe

Hopefully

Much less cooperative than Mayu.

Questions about the Prefect’s family name are met with a stony glare. “It’s Yuu. Just Yuu. How many times do I have to repeat myself?”

Can’t answer any questions about Mayu or her current whereabouts despite admitting to knowing of the girl, but does posit a theory about the three of them transmigrating and swapping places based on the information gained in Konoha

Gets offended and even less cooperative when the interrogating guard calls the hypothesis “crazy”

Not intimidated by Hajime or the other guards in the slightest. Yuu’s classmates are far more likely to inflict lasting bodily harm and it’s hard for even the worst human glare to measure up to Floyd or Leona on a bad day

The Warden scares the Prefect though

Doesn’t stop Yuu from requesting a lawyer or other legal counsel before submitting to further questioning

The Paranoiac is a Japanese citizen and has made a point to know what the applicable legal rights for this situation are

Yuu ends up in the holding cells

Guess who hasn’t learned their lesson while breaking out?

Uno takes one look at Yuu

“Ah Jyugo, this one has your energy”

Nico loudly asks if the Prefect is from an isekai and died and reincarnated in Nanba??! Do they die over and over again and revive to beat bad guys?? Do they have an amazing cheat skill?? Are they a spider?? Can they shoot a beam??

Yuu just thinks. Ah. So this is what would happen if Kalim and Idia somehow had a kid

Don’t break the Prefect out, but Jyugo comes back later and deposits something through the bars

“This is Kuu. He’s a guard, but he’s also really good when you’re lonely. You look like you could use the company”

Yuu blinks and holds out a hand for the black cat with a guard cap to sniff

Crashing in a cell cot is uncomfortable, but hey, at least there’s a cat to pet

Mayu—> Night Raven College

Why is there a tanuki in her bed?

Grim isn’t waking up by being murdered but being poked with a stick by another smol child isn’t much better

Mayu is Concerned by the Theory Wall

“Is— is the person who lives here okay?”

Grim: Hell if I know

Mayu’s even more Concerned when she opens the fridge and sees it’s bare

>:|

Sanji wouldn’t let these people go hungry, so she’s not going to either!

Searches until she finds the Prefect’s grocery money and marches with Grim to Mr. S’s Mystery Shop

Everyone is confused by the presence of a new preteen on campus after the last one vanished from Pomefiore during the night

Mayu’s used to haggling with market people who would rather see her starve than even sell her the worst of their produce, so she’s easily able to barter Sam down to a third of the price for the groceries she wants to buy

Sam’s more amused by the guts of this tiny samurai devil than anything

Mayu and Grim drag all the food back by themselves with a few students following from a distance out of curiosity

They all soon enter Ramshackle once the smells of cooking begin to emerge from the dorm

Silver first followed because the child has a sword and is now helping to knead dough

Epel arrived because he had questions about where Nana had gone, but Mayu is genuinely clueless so now he’s peeling apples for lack of anything better to do

Mayu soon has several “helpers” for making bread and other easy-to-preserve and mix-and-match bulk meals to fill the Ramshackle fridge, though she soon has to send Grim out for more ingredients when her helpers begin getting hungry

The night ends with a feast that can rival the quality of food served at Kalim’s parties

Mayu finds one of Yuu’s blank notebooks and writes down some easy recipes the Prefect can use for all the food now in the fridge and pantry, with emphasis on fish based dishes

The ghosts and Grim enjoy having Mayu much more than Nana

Mayu still has trouble sleeping in the big Ramshackle bed that night

Nana—> Konohagakure

Well this isn’t Nanba or Night Raven College

Welp. Time to go then.

Nana is halfway out of Konoha before anyone notices

Gai does notice because a strange kid in a prison jumpsuit swiftly scurrying to the exit sticks out like a sore thumb in the early morning

ANBU’s search for the vanished Yuu is the only reason Nana isn’t stopped by them

Nana tries to run

Nothing can outrun the Beautiful Green Beast of Konoha

Nana is now more than slightly traumatized

Gets carted off to early morning training with Naruto and Lee

Is initially more interested in plotting yet another escape attempt until Lee mentions Yuu and NRC—then he’s curious about what information he can glean about the two other members of this triad

Especially interested in the concept of reincarnating into another world or being brought there by an outside force rather than moving between worlds freely

Eats an almost alarming amount for his size at breakfast that morning and leaves nothing on his plate

Unfailingly well-mannered to his hosts

Offers more information about Mayu’s past world in payment for eating the Ketsugi’s food and waking up in their home after they refuse to let him pay them back using manual labor

Asks them to tell him what they already know so he can work out what knowledge gaps to fill in

Nana: ...Why are you singing Wonderwall?

Takes it upon himself to teach Lee and Naruto more English so they can at least form basic sentences

It’s an uphill battle because predicates and participles are hard

A supportive and encouraging if slightly inept teacher

Soon realizes Chie somehow knows all the swearwords and glares at him for trying to teach them to the boys

Also falls ill from eating chakra-infested food

Gets twitchier as the day goes on and asks to leave the village several times, insisting he can’t impose on their hospitality any longer

Only agrees to sleep on the couch once Jirou subtly implies that at least people will notice and go looking if he goes missing from their house compared to if he disappeared from a tree miles away from Konoha

Can’t sleep on the couch due to jumping at noises during the night, ends up curling up on the floor next to it

[pancake-man]

PRUMANO SECRET VALENTINE

My gift for @canadiatuxedo for @prumano-week‘s secret valentine!! I went with the prompts Bakery and Fantasy AU, which turned out less fantasy and more medieval times? Anyways, sorry it’s late, I really hope you like it!

AO3 link

The world is a vast place, and Gilbert had travelled the whole thing round three times before he stumbled on a town named Lumin. It was nestled in tall mountains, and so small it hardly deserved a name. Normally it wasn’t the sort of place Gilbert would stop at, but one does grow tired of large fantastical cities eventually, and so he decided to try his luck somewhere more… quaint.

(This was his excuse, anyways. What actually happened was that Gilbert ran out of money halfway to the great city of Aveni and the carriage he hitched a ride on had unceremoniously dropped him in the middle of nowhere and driven off without looking back. Gilbert was stuck there until he earned enough money to grab another ride, but who knew how long that would take in a town that relied more on trade than money)

A small town, Gilbert thought, was the perfect place to start his fortune. So he had set forth with nothing but the clothes on his back and his flute, eager to entertain the town with his beautiful voice, stories, and musical skill.

Now he sat on a fountain in the town square, exhausted from a day of playing his heart out. His poor flute seemed just as tired, sitting quietly on the stone beside him. In his cap he’d only received a few copper, not even enough to rent a room, let alone buy himself a ticket out.

As Gilbert began to reason a back-up plan, his nose picked up a smell drifting on the breeze. Rossinia has one main street with the town square, the church(which doubled as town hall), a small inn, and a small number of shops. Gilbert gathered his things and stood, following the scent to the bakery. He counted his coins. Four copper. Enough for a roll, at least. Maybe a sausage if he was lucky.

Gilbert pushed open the door to the bakery and was immediately greeted by the warm scent of baked goods. He hadn’t realised how chilly it was getting outside until he was surrounded but hot ovens and warm rolls. His mouth watered. He went to the counter to order and-

“Fuck off, we’re closed!” Came a cry from the back. Gilbert leaned around the counter and saw the back of a young brunet working the oven. He had a large iron rod and was poking at the coals. He leaned over to add more and Gilbert’s mouth watered for a different reason.

“Um, I just need something small?” Gilbert looked around for a menu with prices, but there wasn’t one to be found. Of course not, because that would make sense. 

The man in the back room cursed again, threw the door to the coals shut, and wiped his hands on his apron before stomping out to the front. He looked about ready to tear Gilbert a new one when he paused and gave him a once over. Gilbert stood up a little straighter and pushed his silver hair back self-consciously, and gave the man an eye himself.

He was short, even compared to Gilbert, which didn’t happen often, and seemed only a few years younger. He had dark curly hair and tanned skin, and the brownest eyes Gilbert thinks he’s ever seen(and he’s seen a lot of eyes). His lips and eyebrows seemed permanently pulled downwards, but with his pudgy cheeks it was the opposite of intimidating. He wore a green short-sleeved tunic and an apron, both of which were covered in flour and served the added bonus of showing off his (very nice) arms. Really, he was pretty cute.

“You’re not from around here,” the man said with a scowl.

“Eh, yeah, I’m just dropping by. Travelling bard, yaknow how it is,” Gilbert hefted his flute as evidence. The stranger’s scowl didn’t let up.

“What kind of dumbass comes to a town like this for money? You’d be better off in Aveni or something.”

“Oh, this is just a stop. Consider yourselves blessed to get to hear my amazing playing,” Gilbert winked and leaned on the counter.

The man calmly pulled a rag from the pocket of his apron. “Hair and eyes like yours don’t seem like a fucking blessing.” He whipped Gilbert’s arm off the counter with the rag. “And nobody wants to hear your shit music.”

Okay, ouch. Both the rag and the comment. Gilbert jingled his cap. “I’ll have you know I earned four coppers today, thank you very much. My music is awesome.”

His cap was snatched from his hands before Gilbert could react, and the man poked through the change before handing it back with an eyeroll. “Yeah, you can get about jack and, let me check, shit for that. I might have a stale bread roll in the back for that much.”

Now Gilbert’s easy air fell. That was a high price, though he supposed it made sense considering how far they were from any actual people. “That’s… it?” He poked through the coins again. “I can work for a bit more or something. I’m not very strong, but I’m smart. I’m Gilbert, by the way.” He stuck out a palm as a way of calming the stranger’s (frankly unwarranted) dislike of him. 

“Tch,” the man batted Gilbert’s hand away. “Don’t care.” He stretched and looked around the room. “I guess I can give you a fresh one…” he started.

“Oh! Awesome!” Gilbert grabbed the man’s hand anyways, shaking it vigorously. “That’s really nice of you, yknow I’ve had a pretty tough week and it’s good to know there’s nice people even in a weird town like…” and on he went. 

The man looked taken aback, too stunned by Gilbert’s sudden change in demeanor to comprehend any of his babbling, let alone retrieve his hand. “Oi!” He finally snapped, cutting Gilbert off mid-tangent. “I’m not your damn friend, capiche? I’m just giving you extra because you look like a fucking ghost and it makes me feel bad. I mean shit, when was the last time you ate?”

Good question. Gilbert had snacked plenty on stolen goods from his ride’s bag, but it had been a while since he’d gotten a proper meal. He shrugged. The man threw his arms up. “You see! I hate people like you, wandering from town to town and expecting people to take care of your dumb ass because you can’t take care of yourself. You’re lucky you’re cute, for fuck’s sake! Even with the weird eye thing,  I mean seriously what the hell is up with that? It’s fucking weird. And-”

It was Gilbert’s turn to cut him off. “You think I’m cute?” he asked, feeling his ears start to go red.

There was a pause before the man was shaking his head, clearly flustered. “No, I didn’t mean- I barely even know you! That’s a weird thing to say to a complete fucking stranger! What the fuck, Lovino?”

There was practically steam coming out of Gilbert’s ears as he attempted to parse what just happened. He’d been hit on before, sure, but never by anyone this pretty, and never so outright. The red eyes usually threw off anyone who actually found him hot, and even without them Gilbert wouldn’t consider himself ‘conventionally attractive’, whatever that meant. The only thing his mind managed to pick up on was “Lovino? Is that your name?” 

Lovino was working his fingers through his hair and looked up at that. “Yes?” he squeaked. “I mean! No! Fuck you!” He grabbed the nearest baked good, a warm pretzel covered in butter, and shoved it at Gilbert. “It’s free! Fuck off!” He said and pushed Gilbert towards the door.

Gilbert was still tasting the name Lovino on his tongue and went on instinct. He ended up outside, pretzel in hand, wondering what the hell just happened. Turning, he could see Lovino (Lovino, he thought again) hurriedly closing the place up. It was bright inside the bakery. The light spilled through the windows and into the quickly-darkening street. Gilbert looked up to see the last bits of sun dip behind a mountain.

By the time he turned again, the bakery was dark, and the door to the back room was closed. There was still bread on the shelves and flour on the floor, but apparently Lovino had decided that was enough and the day was done. A chill blew down main street, and Gilbert stuffed the warm pretzel into his mouth. Maybe he could find a stable to sleep in… Or even better, a barn.

The next day found Gilbert again in the main square, cap on the stone before him and flute pressed lightly to his lips. Today he caught the children headed home from a day of school, and they were eager to gather round and listen to his stories. Being children, they only had two copper between them, but they more than made up for it with sweets, shiny rocks, and marbles. This brought Gilbert up to six coppers and enough sweets to make a meal(anything adults say about ‘vegetables’ and ‘health’ is a lie).

Even while doing his bit, Gilbert only needed to glance up to be able to see the bakery across the street, and Lovino inside, very pointedly ignoring him. The butcher, the cobbler, and even the bishop were kind enough to step out and listen to Gilbert’s tunes, but Lovino kept his back to the windows whenever possible. It was cute, Gilbert thought. The more he watched the man, the more he felt a tightness in his chest.

Six copper… Hardly enough for a carriage, but a perfect place to start saving. Gilbert chewed on his lip as he counted out his day’s earnings. The sun would set soon, and most people had gone home or were in the process of closing up their shops. Surely he could spare a few coin, right?

Gilbert went into the bakery.

Immediately he was greeted by a snort, and “You again? I told you I don’t do handouts! And also to fuck off!”

Gilbert grinned and deposited his earnings on the counter. “No handouts, today. Turns out your town actually enjoys my awesome music.”

Lovino poked at the copper like it was a venomous spider. “You didn’t steal it?” That was actually rather insulting. Gilbert’s eyebrows knit together. “Of course not! I was out by the fountain all day. If you’d bothered to look up, you’d have seen me.”

There wasn't a response, instead Lovino stared at Gilbert. Or right behind him, it wasn’t clear. Gilbert looked about and back to Lovino. He had such deep brown eyes,  Gilbert could write songs about them. "You have hay in your fucking hair," he said, in a voice that was absolutely melodi-

"Eh?" Gilbert raised a hand to pat at his hair. "Where?"

"It's right- no, you're missing it. Just, shit, let me-" Lovino leaned across the counter, his dark fingers combing through Gilbert's hair, and Gilbert forgot to breathe. Lovino pulled back with a large clump of straw, and the two looked at it for a moment.

"Huh," said Gilbert. "I dunno how I missed that."

"Haybrain," Lovino scowled, and turned to toss the straw in a wastebasket. "How the hell did you get that much hay in your hair anyways? Sleep in a fucking haystack?"

"Uh, yeah, actually." Not far outside of town, Gilbert had found a nice barn to sleep in. It was small, and brown, and missing a door, but it still had a good haypile, and not too many bugs, so he counted as a win. "I've slept in worse places though, no big deal."

The coins made a scraping sound as they were pushed across the counter to him. "So you're a hobo," Lovino said and began packing a bag full of rolls. "How much shit have you eaten since that pretzel?"

Gilbert's ears turned red again. "I prefer awesome travelling bard, but yeah, sure, hobo. And I'll have you know," he turned up his nose, making light of the situation, "that I recieved a fortune's worth of candy from the schoolchildren today, and it has fed me quite well."

"A haybrain hobo who steals from kids, sure." A smile twitched at the corner of Lovino's lips if Gilbert squinted just right. The baker closed the bag and handed it over. It was still warm from the oven. "I don't do handouts. You owe me." Gilbert began to go on his grovelling spiel when Lovino held up a finger to stop him. "Nope. I'm serious. Go play your dumb songs until I'm closed, then I've got a place for you to stay until you fuck off to Aveni or wherever. But you work for your keep, capische?" Before Gilbert could respond, Lovino pressed his finger forward and into Gilbert's lips. "Capische?"

Gilbert nodded. Lovino pulled away, satisfied. "Okay, then help me clean this shit up. Nobody gets a proper dinner or sleep until this place closes, and it's gonna take a while since somebody fucked me over last night. So stop fucking distracting me with your pretty, stupid face."

"My what?" Gilbert managed to ask.

"Your pretty fucking stupid face. Here." A broom handle was shoved into Gilbert's hands and he was directed into the back room to sweep the hearth. In the time it took him to clean the ashes, Lovino had put up all the unsold items, washed all the dishes, wiped down the counters, and shut the blinds and locked the door.

Gilbert wiped a sooty arm across his face and smiled. "Anything else, Lord Lovino?"

Lovino frowned at him. "How in the fuck did you manage to get that covered in soot?"

"I've never had to clean a fireplace," Gilbert shrugged. Lovino groaned.

"Fine, I might have a shirt or something that would fit you."

The only thing left to do was blow out the candles. Lovino made him resweep the shop front anyways before he deemed the bakery clean enough to close, and put out the lights. He led Gilbert upstairs to a small living quarter. There was a fireplace with herbs strung to dry above it, a small shelf lined with jars, a trunk, and a table with one chair, but Gilbert's eyes were drawn to the bed. The only bed. The small only bed. Now his whole face was red.

Despite Gilbert's best efforts, Lovino caught this, and his eyes widened in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry, I didn't- I didn't even think about that," he blustered through a series of surprisngly curse-void apologies while digging through the trunk. "Just, here," and he threw a tunic at Gilbert's head.

Gilbert caught it easily. It was a plain red linen tunic, and seemed only a bit too big. He looked at Lovino. "Aren't you going to turn around?" A squeak of shame and Lovino turned his back. Gilbert slipped off his sooty clothes with a promise of "I'll wash them tomorrow," and put on the tunic. "Okay, you're good."

Lovino looked back and froze, bottom lip between his teeth. Gilbert pulled one of the sleeves up from where it had slipped off his shoulder self consciously. "Is there still hay in my hair?"

"Nope!" Lovino said, far too quickly. "I mean. No. You look great. I mean fine. I mean you look like shit. I'm going to bed." He swiveled on his heel and went back to the trunk, procuring a pile of furs, probably saved for cold winter months. "The floor should be fine enough, at least better than a hay stack, for fucks sake. Figure yourself out." With that, Lovino threw himself into the bed and turned his back to Gilbert.

"This'll be fine, thanks," Gilbert began, but it was clear Lovino was ignoring him. Eh. He put his flute and his cap on the ground and spread out the furs, then laid down. He wasn't used to sleeping this early, so instead he studied the eaves of the ceiling above him. He rolled over, stared at the back of Lovino's brunet head.

Lovino was an interesting person. Gilbert had met lots of interesting people in his travels, but none quite like this. People were generally either kind or not, but Gilbert had never met someone kind enough to open their home to a complete stranger, who then pretended to hate everyone and everything. He didn't understand. He wanted to understand. It was weird.

"Lovi?" He asked the back of Lovino's head. Silence. Then:

"The fuck did you just call me?"

"Why do you live alone?"

Another pause, this one longer. Gilbert almost asked another question to break the tension before Lovino responded. "Cause my family all had better places to be. Why do you travel alone?"

"Cause I left my family behind," Gilbert answered, easily. Lovino shifted in his bed. "Are you lonely?"

"No. Are you?"

"Yes." Lovino stiffened. Gilbert rolled onto his back. "I was never really close with my folks, even before I left. It's hard to miss what you never had, but I miss it anyways."

Quiet stretched between them. Gilbert could hear Lovino's breath slow, to the point that he almost thought him asleep. "Are you cold?" came Lovino's question, whispered so softly Gilbert hardly heard it.

"Yes," Gilbert lied.

He heard the sound of blankets shifting, and when he looked over, Lovino was staring back, his blankets open in a welcome. Neither said anything. Gilbert stood from his nest and shuffled into the already warm bed, pressed himself against Lovino's warm body.

"Fuck!" Lovino shouted, kicking away his feet. "Your feet as cold as balls!"

Gilbert laughed and shoved him back.  "That's just because you're too warm. Sorry, Lovi."

Lovino rolled so his back was too Gilbert, his legs pointedly pressed to the wall and away from Gilbert's. "Fuck you," pause, "Gil."

(I realised only afterwards that this would’ve been better from Lovi’s perspective but, eh. Two lonely losers who managed to find each other. Gilbert ends up staying in town and working at the bakery, probably also teaching music lessons or something. Lovino gets to buy a bigger bed. It’s gay. Sorry you didn’t get a kiss. Happy Valentine’s Day!)

[ravenforce]

Stark Legacy III

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Carol Danvers x Wanda Maximoff x Maria Hill x Reader

Word Count: 2869

A/N: Oh gosh. I’m so sorry I haven’t been updated a lot of fics recently. There’s no excuse except that Animal Crossing New Horizon is taking up so much of my time but I am working on being more productive. Also, it doesn’t help that somehow I can’t seem to come to terms with this chapter. I feel like everything I write is shit. That’s why I’m trying to let the creative energy blockage to pass. I hope you guys like this chapter. Stay safe. xx

Parts: 1 | 2  | 4  | 5 | 6

***

After a week of poking and prodding at the Avengers compound, Fury finally agreed to let you stay off-site. Not that he has any say on your decision, anyway. He’s not the boss of you. You knew it will only cause more valuable time to be wasted if you resist, you compromised by letting Happy be assigned to you. The same way he was assigned to the handle Spider-man before. You felt like a child, it was ridiculous.

“Are you sure you don’t want to take back your position in the office?” Pepper asked as she enters the living room where you’ve been watching the city from its floor-to-ceiling windows. Happy drove you directly to Stark Tower, which Pepper handed the keys back to you. It’s now the Avengers Tower but technically it is still owned by Stark Industries. Thus, still owned by you, Pepper and Morgan.

You took a minute looking out the view before turning back towards your sister-in-law. You walked towards her at the centre of the room and gave her arms a squeeze. “Stark Industries is better off in your hands, P.”

She smiled at you before pulling you into a hug for the nth time since she found out that you’re alive.

“What are you gonna do?” Before you can answer, the door to the penthouse and came walking in is Happy with a beautiful little girl in tow.

“Hey,” Happy greeted. “Sorry, we’re a bit late. Someone made one too many stops at the labs.”

Pepper beckoned the girl over, and immediately she took her mother’s hand. “Morgan, I’d like you to meet somebody.” Morgan took one look at you. A look of recognition passes on her face before she let go of Pepper’s hand to run towards you. She came barreling to your leg.

“Hey,” you greeted while running your hand over her soft hair. You look at Pepper with a questioning look.

“Morgan, do you know who this is?” Morgan pulled away from where she’s perched on your leg and look back at Pepper.

“Yes, mom. She’s Y/N Stark. Daddy’s baby sister.” She turned back to you with a smile.

You crouched down in front of her. You offered her your hand to shake but Morgan had another idea. She threw her arms around your neck and nearly tackled you down in a tight hug. You chuckled. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Morgan Stark.”

She giggled and pulled away. “You’re a silly humanoid.”

Everyone stopped and stared at the little girl. Pepper recovered first. “Sweetheart, how’d you know that word?” She asked. Morgan only looked at you before running her hand over where your ball-joints are connected.

“Dad told me everything.” You rolled your eyes internally at your brother, wherever he is. “I’m not sure how it worked but Dad said you’re the best sister ever, and that when you wake up, you’ll be the best aunt too.”

That got you down on your ass on the floor. You can’t cry, not really but at that moment, had you been human, you would’ve been crying your eyes out. Suddenly, sitting there on the floor with your brother’s offspring in front of you, you were overcome with so much grief. Life wasn’t fair.

Why did your brother have to die, and you, survive? He had more to live for than you. He has a wife. He has a daughter. He was happy. He deserved to live, too.

Morgan cupped your face. She must have seen through your robotic face. “It’s okay Y/N. We’ll be okay.”

You blinked twice at her before nodding. She’s an intuitive, emphatic kid. She is really Pepper and Tony’s daughter. No question about that. Then Morgan started chewing at her bottom lip.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just…” she paused. She looked unsure of what to ask or how to ask her question. So, you run your hand through her hair and assured her that she could ask you anything. “…uhm. I just want to know how your body is operating? Is F.R.I.D.A.Y installed in your core? Or was it J.A.R.V.I.S?”

“Morgan!” Pepper admonished, and for Morgan’s part, she looked sheepish. You can only gape at your eight-years-old niece for a minute. She truly is a Stark and one that hanged out with her dad too much, apparently.

“Well, right now there’s no AI installed in this body but I’m planning to put one on my own. Maybe you could help me name it when it’s done?”

Morgan grinned before launching in a barrage of questions, only child geniuses could ask at that age.

“Excuse me, Y/N.” Pepper cut in through your nerd conversation with Morgan. “Do you mind if I use the kitchen to make us dinner? I don’t think the little one would want to leave soon.”

“Knock yourself out. Happy stocked up before we arrived.” That’s all the answer Pepper got before you and Morgan moved from the floor to your new bedroom to continue geeking out about your robotics.

Happy sidled up to the blonde as they watch you two happily chatting. “It’s a match made in heaven,” Happy teased; earning a soft chuckle from Pepper.

“Yeah. Finally, someone who can keep up with her.”

Morgan and Pepper are really close but Pepper suspects that Morgan misses having someone geeky in the house that can talk to her about engineering, robotics, science, history, etc.

***

Morgan and Pepper stayed for two nights in the tower. You wished they could have stayed longer but Morgan has school but Pepper promised they’ll be back every weekend. Without Morgan in the house, it’s far too quiet even with Happy around. Speaking of the man, you found him after your shower, lounging at the bar over some S.H.I.E.L.D folders. 

“Busy?” you asked as you went to the coffee machine by instinct. Happy watched you freeze for a moment but he didn’t say anything. He understood that you’re still coping with your new normal.

“Nope. Why?” He closed all his open folders but left them on the counter. 

You turned towards him with a smile. “Great. I need your help.” 

When you said you needed his help. He thought maybe you needed help where he can use his talents as an agent but instead he found himself dusting around Tony’s old on-site lab. It looks exactly the same as the last time Tony used it. Not a single furniture and equipment out of place. It was nostalgic and bittersweet to be there again. 

“Ugh!” He groaned after putting one more box in the storage room. You looked at your friend as he sweats through his shirt and stretches his back. 

“Tired already?” You asked in a teasing voice. 

“My back is killing me, and aren’t you?” You laughed and he turned to look at you. For a minute he forgot you are not exactly human anymore. A few nights ago you mentioned, post-human, and he thought it was quite a fitting classification. He decided that’s what he’s gonna use from then on.

“Actually, I can do this all day.” Happy rolled his eyes at you before giving you the finger. You laughed hard before you walked towards him.

“Sit down. Let the one who can’t get backaches do the heavy lifting.” He can hear the joy in your voice as you continue to tease him of his fragility. You handed him your new tablet, while you started carrying the rest of the boxes into storage. 

“What am I supposed to do with this?”

You stopped and chuckled. You pulled out a folded paper from your pocket. It’s a list of equipment and materials. “Please, purchase everything on that list. You can find most of them from Stark Industries. The rest you can outsource on Amazon.” 

Happy looked at the list and started putting everything in your cart. “Are you building something?”

You dusted your hand and locked the storage room. You plopped down on Tony’s couch and looked at Happy as he concentrates on finding the right items with the right specs for you. 

“Yes.” When no other word from you was forthcoming, he looked up at you. You can see the question in his eyes but before he can voice it out, you threw him a rolled-up parchment. He barely caught it and he glared at you. When he opened it, his eyes almost popped out of its socket. 

“Y/N.” He pause to consider what this little project means.  

“You’re not?” he broke off in the middle. 

“I am.” 

***

The dream team is spending their much deserved weekend off after being away for a month-long mission in Hungary. Usually, they would spend their weekend at home after long missions but they’ve been coup up in the safe house for a month and had only been going out on surveillance twice in every week. So, to change things up a little bit, they found themselves out on a bustling Saturday night. The plan was simple: have dinner on Wanda and Carol’s restaurant of choice, and maybe a walk along the park to aid their digestion.

“Oh, this is so good,” Carol nearly moaned after taking her first bite on the strawberry shortcake they ordered for dessert.

“I’m really glad we’re able to do this.” They all smiled at Wanda before Nat reached out and wipe the icing that stuck on the side of her lips. Wanda blushed. After all this time, Natasha still makes her flush like crazy, and it doesn’t help that she’s the smoothest out of all of them. Except with you, that is.

It’s an observation she gathered from the handful of times they’ve interacted with you in the HQ. Even Carol and Maria agrees that Nat is uncharacteristically a mess whenever you’re around. It’s a topic they have yet the time, and the energy to breach with the redhead.

“To us.” Maria raised her glass and everybody promptly clinked their glasses together. Not a minute after, the sound of sirens was heard along the street. They looked at each other before pulling out their phones, and they were shocked to see multiple miscalls from HQ.

“Shit.” They groaned collectively but before they can even think to stand and bolt, another restaurant patron yelled.

“Missile!”

It’s like time stood still. Even with years of work and training, they were rendered frozen and rooted in place, waiting for the inevitable to hit. After Thanos, they all had to undergo mandatory therapy for PTSD. Nat and Wanda went because losing Clint and Vision still haunts their dreams, Maria for being dusted herself, and Carol for stress management.

***

“Ms Stark that missile is heading straight for Agent Hill, Danvers, Romanoff, and Maximoff.”

“What?” You yelled at your newly developed AI before putting more speed to catch the missile. You can see the four idiots just standing there frozen. You caught glimpse of the missile timer, and you thought you’re not gonna make it into the stratosphere before it explodes. So, you raced ahead of it and triggered one of your suit’s new feature: electromagnet shield before it exploded in your chest.

***

Maria squinted as they watch the missile approached their location. Something else is flying towards them. Something she can’t put a finger on but oh so familiar.

“Is that - ” She wasn’t able to finish the question before Carol and Natasha were tackling her and Wanda on the ground. Then the missile exploded.

***

For a minute, there’s a ringing in their ear, and they were severely disoriented. Carol and Natasha rolled away from their girlfriends and laid their back, feeling the cold, concrete floor. They tried to blink rapidly to clear the white spots that are floating around their vision. Maria was the first to sit up, followed by Carol, then Natasha and Wanda. They looked at each other, making sure everyone was unharmed. 

“What just happened?” Carol asked, with her hand outstretched to help everyone up. 

Wanda was quiet for a moment before she was running towards the balcony, where a few customers are gathered around the mouth of the restaurant, hovering around something. Before they could question her what’s up, she just jumped out of the balcony instead of using the stairs like a normal person. 

“Shit. What now?” Nat followed Wanda over the balcony and landed gracefully at the sidewalk. Carol floated down on her Captain Marvel suit, while Maria exited the establishment through the front door. She walked towards the crowd and whipped out her badge to clear the bystanders. Carol, Nat, and Wanda helped to make a perimeter, so their girlfriend can assess the situation. 

When they saw what it is, they were frozen for the second time around that night. 

“Who is that? Is that RESCUE? Is she gonna be okay?”

An onslaught of questions was thrown to them but they have absolutely no clue how to answer. The suit does look a little like Pepper’s RESCUE but instead of blue and white, this one is pure black. The helmet is unmistakably Iron Man’s original design. 

“It’s Y/N,” Wanda whispered as she and Carol crowd over your body to shield you from everyone’s view. Maria is frantically typing on her phone, asking for a pickup team on their location ASAP. Nat’s crouched down and poking at your helmet. 

“The blast must have knocked her out.” Another poke to the helmet.

“Stop poking me, Agent Romanoff. It’s a rude way to say thanks.” She startled when she heard your voice before the lights on your helmet came back on. She stood up and sidled with Maria. Captain Marvel offered her hand and you took it. 

“Thank you.” 

“No, thank you for saving us back there.” You opted to nod at the Captain since she can’t see you smile and you don’t want to retract your helmet and expose yourself. You hovered over the ground and looked behind them.

Nat caught the action, as small as it. “We’re attracting too much attention. Meet us back at the HQ.”

“The tower is closer.” They all turned to Maria for consent and she freely gave it. 

Before you can fly off, a young boy yelled. “Hey! Are you RESCUE?” 

You hovered back down and crouched in front of him. “No, I’m not but we’re friends.”

“What’s your name then?”

“I’m Phantom.” You pinched the boy’s cheeks before flying back to the tower. You looked back and saw him smiling and waving at you.

[t-lostinworlds]

The Devil All The Time: A Review That No One Asked For

Well, I don’t know why I’ve been putting this off but here I am 48 hours later. Though the fact that I’m still thinking about the movie two days later is proof how long it stays with you right after you watch it. By all means, I’m not an expert reviewer aha so this maybe all over the place but: It is a good movie. It wasn’t perfect of course, the flow could’ve been a tad bit better, and the narrator threw me off sometimes, a few missing bits in terms of the characters but it’s still good nonetheless. I do want to point out that the movie wasn’t as dark and brutal as how the book went. It wasn’t a graphic or gore as I’d expected it because some critics did overplay it. So, if you’ve read the book, the movie will come off as a much lighter tone. Also, if you watched GoT, then you’ll be fine with the gore. But with that said, there are still triggering scenes so people should still be mindful when watching. A couple of changes but that’s a given with every book adaptation but there were a few that I thought was better in the movie than in the book, which I will get more into in a sec because I’ll try and keep this other half spoiler free.

The visuals, the cinematography, it was beautiful. I loved how everything looked on screen, scenery, colors, lighting, the whole lot. The music and the little added touches of sound effects was just so spot on that you just feel more on edge as the movie goes, like little ticks here and there. Now, the cast, whew. Nobody fell short with their performance. Some might have smaller screen times than others but still, nobody was lackluster or pushed to the side and they gave their best with the material they were given. Although, I may be biased but from what I’ve been seeing around I think we can all agree that Tom Holland struck out the most (I’ll gush about him more under the cut aha).

Long babbling short, I loved it. Right after I finished watching, it truly did feel like I went running lol, like I got so into it that those last few moments (or every intense scene for that matter) that it had me at the edge of my seat. But I also wanted to watch it again soon after. It may not be for everyone’s taste, although I am interested to see what the people who haven’t read the book thought of it because I do see how it can come off confusing in some parts. I already knew what was going to happen and some background on why it happened so it was easy for me to fill in the missing pieces. But with that said, it’s still a good adaptation and it stayed as true as it can get to the books. 8.5/10 would recommend watching, with caution of course.

a more detailed (specific scenes, characters, actors performance, and more) rambling below the cut aka spoilers ahead!!

I’m going to start off with Willard Russell who was played so well by Bill Skarsgård. I haven’t seen anything else of his before but he was so good in this movie. His interaction with Haley Bennett's character Charlotte was different from the book but I'm not mad on how it played out in the movie either. It was a cute and a little awkward interaction which was all good. Charlotte is exactly how I thought of her, a sweet, beautiful, caring lady and Haley played her just as well. Especially with the scene where she and Arvin were singing together, that was just the sweetest thing.

But back to Willard (Bill) and all his interaction with little Arvin (who was also so great btw), it was just damn. For one, in the truck after he beat the living daylights out of those men, that switch of him being out of breath and angry and him teaching Arvin about those bullies and finding the right time and him saying, "there's a lot of no good sons of b*tches out there." to when Arvin asked him if it was more than a hundred and he chuckled as if he didn't almost just killed a man? And then suddenly he was back to this loving father who cares so much about his family and would anything to protect and defend them (sounds familiar right? Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.) Although I will say that Willard is a much horrible person in the book than he was in the film. The prayer log could've gotten more… bloody and gross as time passed by. And the thing with Jack Russell (Arvin's dog, who wasn't actually a jack russell but oh well), they changed it so that he was with them longer so it did have more weight if you put it that way since Arvin has grown to love Jack, so killing him off screen was still going to be heart breaking. But in the book, it was a stray dog that wandered into their place and Arvin fed him, named him but on the same day, as soon as Willard got home he shot the dog right in front of Arvin. Now that would've been much crueler and could've showed just how far gone Willard is with his whole "faith" and how desperate he was on saving his wife who he's so in love with but damn, the things love can make people do. Or, they could've added the part where Willard killed the lawyer and poured his blood on the prayer log because that for me was a turning point in the book where I went, Willard has lost his freakin mind with the sacrifices. They did show the lawyer in the movie that's why I was a bit confused when it didn't happen but you can't cram anymore into a 2-hour movie. To conclude, this movie made me want to watch more of Bill for sure, but I'm too scared to watch IT (im a coward) so looking forward to what he does in the future.

Next I want to talk about are Helen, Roy and Theodore. Mia Wasikowska was great. She had so little screen time but whenever you see her on screen she just embodies Helen so well. Helen didn't have much to do in the book either aside from the fact that she was supposed to marry Willard and then didn't because Willard went off with Charlotte and Helen went to marry Roy which was kind of the starting to point as to why everything in their life has gone to hell, and then be a sweet mother to Lenora. But besides that, Mia gave her best and served the character well in my opinion. Theodore on the other hand could've done so so much more. Given that he was the driving force that made Roy kill Helen. If ever I haven't read the book, it would’ve look rather random how suddenly he wanted to try resurrection. Roy and Theodore's relationship could've been explained more, specifically Theo's feelings because that was why he pushed Roy to do it. Now, Harry Melling as Roy Laferty was great. The scene with the spiders and then the emotions you see in his face and his eyes when he tried to resurrect Helen? Remarkable. The slow realization that it wasn't working, the shift on his face was so clear and that momene where it crosses his mind that he just killed his wife it was just, Dudley Dursley who? Though his death came earlier than I expected, and they changed quite a lot and it felt so random how he just left Theo in the car and went on a hitchhike when in the book, Theo died first that's why Roy decided to try and go back to his daughter. But his death scene was still intense, and the fact that his last word was Lenora? His daughter? Amazing.

So, now we see Carl and Sandy Henderson, who showed immediately how crazy they were when they killed Roy (who wasn't their first kill but). Both Riley Keough and Jason Clarke were fantastic, and they really did bring the uneasiness so well on screen. And I love how you can actually see how Sandy change from the first time we see her to the last, like it looked like Sandy was played by two different actresses so huge props to Riley for smashing that role from innocent sweet girl to this troubled serial killer. Although I wished their story was showed better, more so Carl than Sandy because out of the two, Carl was much, much sicker in the head than Sandy. He was the one who'd constantly look at those horrible photos and do…stuff, which was so sooo gross to read I feel sick just thinking about it. But Jason Clarke did a great job at portraying Carl's creepiness as much as he could, like I couldn't bear looking at him on screen without grimacing.

Lee Bodecker. Sebastian Stan did a great job a making him insufferable that's for sure. I always love how the moment Lee is on screen Seb is just gone. He just never failed to feel like this weird and corrupt cop or sheriff. Although I will say, his and Sandy's relationship could've been showed better because I have seen where people didn't realize they were siblings until the end. But I do like how you see that Lee doesn't really care that much for Sandy, I mean he does, but not as much. His mind has always been about being re-elected and having these stories about Sandy won't make him look good does it? Though his emotions in the end when he was in that car with Sandy was really spot on.

Emma and Earskell, I won't really dive into much because there's really isn't much to say than they were both great. They both made Arvin and Lenora feel like they do have a family and that they weren't alone, like they just came off as kind people on screen. But gosh Emma, that woman deserves a proper vacation for everything that she's went through. But Lenora, oh gosh, her story and how it ended was the most painful to read and watch. She was just a sweet innocent girl who got bullied and she deserved none of that. Eliza Scanlen was just wow. I loved her in Little Women, loved her even more on here as well. And her chemistry with Arvin (Tom) in the movie was just amazing, like they bounced of each other so well and you can see with just one look how much she admires Arvin. But the last scene where you can see her face, that split moment when she paused and then slowly smiled as she thought how her grandma won't be ashamed, and that she will take care of her baby and give it the life that it deserves but then she slipped and that made the scene even more heart wrenching. Let me tell, I screamed "Nooooo!" when I read it in the book and I screamed just as loud when I saw it on screen despite already knowing how it ends.

That f*cking rev. tergaryen what's his face. I couldn’t stand him in the book couldn’t stand him just as much in the movie which says a lot on how great of an actor Robert Pattison is. Each time he's on screen I emotionally and physically just can't stand him. Mind you I watched all his scenes with the Reaster girl and his wife with a proper scowl and kept looking away. But his scene with Lenora in the car I was peeking through my fingers because I can't sit and watch it fully because it was just so disgusting to watch. Robert Pattison played him so well that even his voice was just so creepy like dude, shut up. And when he was manipulating Lenora, rambling about his freakin delusions? Ugh I really wanted to punch the screen, big kudos to Rob for bringing that disgusting character to life. And well, I'll say he did get what he deserved in the end so.

Last but definitely not the least, Tom Holland as Arvin Russell. Gosh, where do I even start with this lad? This boy has range I can tell you that. I'm going to be talking so much about him so haha sorry but he was just amazing and I need to point out so many things. First scene was his birthday, and you can see how he seemed like just a normal, happy boy celebrating with the people the he loves but the moment Uncle Earskell handed the gun and mentioned that it was his father, his whole mood changes, his whole face fell and the look in Tom's EYES, his eyes does so much to portray his emotions and goodness he's so freakin amazing at switching from one emotion to another in so little time. To be honest, Arvin in the book is much more cold and harsh, even when it's towards Lenora and his Grandma. Hell, he makes sly digs at Lenora in the book which is more of a way to make her see how cruel the world is, sorta a tough love kinda of thing. He's just not that affectionate, with how he grew up, it's a given.

But Tom brought so much more depth to the character that even I didn't see as much while reading the book. Which is why people are so drawn to him, it makes him easier to sympathize and like in the movie, all because Tom added even more layers (i need my onion emoji dammit). I mean, Arvin is complex as is in the book, a lot colder for sure, but with how Tom portrayed him you just get to think so much more on what could possibly be going on in Arvin's head. You can just see all sorts of emotions the character goes through, from being rash, to angry, to hatred, to fear, to sadness, to vulnerability and these emotions happen so close to each other that the switch is just incredibly impressive. When he charged towards those bullies to protect Lenora? This is where you can see that when he's filled with rage, he sometimes doesn't think things through. It was three against one with guys much bigger than him, it was obvious he was never going to win but he still did so anyway because he loved Lenora, he'd do anything to protect and avenge her, why? It's what his father taught him. It's what he saw when he was a kid, that no matter if it’s a violent act, he'll do it for the people that he loves. Like i said in the beginning, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

There so much like father like son moments in this film, which didn't even come off forced because I've seen in an interview where Bill and Tom read their lines together despite not having a scene together and oh did it pay off because you can see a little bit of the Willard you see on the first bit of the movie in Arvin all throughout, which is again, a testament to how great these actors are. Also, Tom's scenes together with Eliza are just wow. It's incredible how much they contrast each other but still be connected in a way, like Lenora is this sweet innocent girl who's kind hearted and is willing to forgive her father for whatever he could've done while Arvin, gosh, every mention of his father his face always falls stoic and it's so amazing to see Tom play that emotion so well with so little movement like a clench of his jaw or his eyes. Their relationship was just so wholesome. Even with that scene in the meat shop where Arvin was teasing his grandma, it was such a sweet moment to see that side of him because in the book, the interaction was just plain he said, she said which I interpreted as being nothing more than a casual conversation but in the movie it was more light-hearted which is so interesting given the a few moments later, you see Arvin's rage again and he was already in fight mode when that preacher insulted Emma's cooking (which was a so not okay that freakin imbecile) which again, slowly opens the doors to how far Arvin will go for the sake of protecting and avenging the ones he love. Also, the fact that they changed who found Lenora's body to Arvin instead of Earskell was far better. My heart freakin broke for that boy when he was screaming as he tried to keep her up in hopes that he could still save her. Thomas Stanley Holland man, that scene was just wow, it was a lot to take in. But that change only added as to how he was going to handle the preacher later in the movie.

What did impress me the most was the quick switch Tom makes with his emotions. First off, that moment with those bullies. He was relentless with how he handled them, just full on anger and hatred like when he beat those boys best believe I kept flinching because it looked painful as hell. And then he says, "I'll kill you." (with that thunder sound which was a really nice touch), and this is where you just see how he's someone you shouldn't mess with who can potentially do so much more damage (which he does). But the moment he gets in his car and closes the door? You see nothing but a kid who's downright scared of what he just did, he knew it was somewhat wrong, like he couldn't actually believe he did that in the first place but as he'd said, he did it because had to and felt like it was the only way, which is again, a callback to what he saw with his father with them 'bullies,' it drilled on him how that's the only way. But my goodness the way his hand shook, his breathing, the fear in his eyes, and then when he wiped the blood on his hand then that flashback with Willard? Yes yes yes, another like father like son moment.

It's the same thing with the way he handled the preacher, it was much more different in the book but I liked this version better. There's just something poetic about it being in the church all while Arvin confessed the preacher's sins for him, it was just amazing writing. But the way his hands shook when he was standing the first time he enters? Like he could’ve done it right then and there but he can't because he's scared. I mean the way his voice was breaking with that sinner line (which was so funny how they made it seem so badass in the trailer) he was trying to get himself together, like the way he was breathing so shakily shows his nerves and his fear. But as he reiterated all the disgusting things the preacher did, you see that rage bubble inside him, you see him slowly grow more confident because his fear was now replaced by anger. And once that his rage was at full capacity, the moment they started talking about Lenora? (Tom and Rob's exchange was amazing btw) He was able to shoot him down with one hand, shaking gone all because he was angry. But as soon as he's dead and the anger subsides, the fear is so quick to consume him, you see it the moment he sits down. And again with his eyes you see it all in his eyes, just Tom Frickin Holland everybody. That exchange was easily the best one.

As for his interaction with Carl and Sandy, his expressions in the back seat as he slowly realizes what was going to happen to him, it was just amazing. This is where you see more of Arvin actually being smart, he's a bit rash and compulsive sure but he is definitely smart. But now, you don't see his anger because he doesn't know this people, the only thing he knows is that they were trying to kill him. So notice how he shot Carl with two hands this time? and how he was shaking exactly as he pulled the trigger? Same with Sandy? Compare that to how he handled the preacher. Also his fear when he thought he got shot? The utter panic was just, though he did puke in the book which would've showed just how much he didn't like what he just did and how he felt so wrong. Same with his interaction with Lee, he knows how asses his situation and damn, I don’t know if its sheer dumb luck or this boy just got incredible aim, I mean he's practiced in the books and he's gotten good but you don't see it in the movie though. But still the same, you see more of him being regretful which just shows how complex he is as a character. And Tom showed all these emotions so freakin well without saying much at all. You just see it, which shows just how talented he is.

Everything somewhat came full circle in the end, he buried Jack's bones which what he's been wanting ever since. And he also buried the gun, which was somewhat him saying how he's had somewhat a closure with his father and that he's putting it all in the pass. And then we end the movie with him trying not to fall asleep which honestly what it felt like after watching the movie. I needed a breather. That last shot was so calming though it does make you wonder where he goes on from here.

My goodness I could go on and on about Tom's performance and I definitely missed so much more but I feel like this is long enough lmao. Also feel like i’ve missed a few moments in the movie as well. Now I hope people will see what good of an actor he is and to show that he's more than just playing Peter Parker. Right, that's enough. I'm going to say how many words in total this was but, it's a lot.

And that is it for The Devil All the Time. A very good movie, would want to watch again but damn, I feel like I need a nap because what a movie indeed.

[peterspideyy]

5 times peter parker wanted to tell you he loves you, and the one time he finally does

summary- basically the title

warnings- angst, death, blood, swear words

1.

the first time peter wanted to tell you he loved you more than a friend was, when you both were studying for a test at his house. may said you could sleep over as it was getting late, and you live across town. she didn’t mind you sleeping over though, it’s not like you haven’t done it before.

“ughh can we stop studying? i feel like my head is about to explode with knowledge!” you sighed heavily, smacking your science book against your head causing peter to laugh tiredly.

“mmm okay, do you want to watch a film?”

“you know it!”

within minutes, peter had star wars on and sweets ready for you both. you were both engrossed in the film in-front of you, while you sat on peter’s bed, covered in blankets. you and peter were so interested in what was happening, that you didn’t realise you both moved your hands at the same time, to pick up the same piece of popcorn, causing your hands to meet and an electrical spark to form.

you both looked at each other, before you smiled, apologising slightly and turned back to the film. but, peter couldn’t turn his eyes away. he was engrossed not in the film, but in you. and in that moment, peter realised he was falling in love with his best friend.

2.

the second time peter wanted to tell you he loved you more than a friend was, when you stood up to flash when he was being mean to peter. it was during lunch at midtown school, where you, peter, ned and mj all sat on your regular table in the canteen. peter couldn’t help but look at you for longer after you spoke. you just looked so beautiful, causing peter to blush. but then, flash came causing you all the groan in annoyance.

“hey penis parker! still with your imaginary girlfriend? or are you still drooling over y/n?”

peter wanted to punch him right in the face when he mentioned your name. but, he also mentally slapped himself for being so dumb at how obvious he was in love with you.

“flash...go away!” peter spoke quietly, not making eye contact, but instead looking at you.

“ohhh, your not denying that you love her then?”

“flash,” you harshly spoke, looking at him, “do us a favour and fuck off! stop saying peter doesn’t have a girlfriend! it just shows how he hasn’t found the right person yet, which is so clever in my opinion! but, you go round the school going out with every girl which is so fucking stupid! so, can you please leave us alone so we can eat our fucking lunch?!”

the whole canteen fell quiet, causing you to blush slightly looking down at her food. seconds later, students forgot about what happened and the canteen came back to life. flash laughed slightly, before walking away which was must of a relief to the group.

“y/n i-i,” peter was going to say it, he was so close to saying it, “i-i i appreciate that you stood up for me.”

“no worries, it’s what best friends do!”

peter flinched at those words. he didn’t want to be best friends with you. he wanted to call you his.

3.

the third time peter wanted to tell you he loved you more than a friend was, when you found out he was spiderman.

it was silly how you found out the friendly neighbourhood spiderman was in fact peter parker. during the school day, you both agreed to go to peter’s house after school to study (which is what you normally do.) you told him that you had to collect something, but would meet him at his house which he happily agreed.

however, peter being spiderman caused him to be hours late to meeting you at his house, due to fighting all the bad guys.

with many persuasions from karen, peter decided to go home, causing him to want his bed even more. when he snook into his room, he was shocked to find you sat on his bed, starring at him.

you must of starred at each other for minutes, before you actually moved towards peter.

“you-you’re spiderman?”

“errr,” peter didn’t know if it was a statement or question, “yehh?”

“w-what? how is this possible? are you an avenger?”

“i’m sure you have lots of questions, which i would answer tomorrow. you know, fighting bad guys is tiring!”

“are you hurt?!”

“shhh y/n!” peter quickly looked to the door, incase may heard.

“may doesn’t know?!”

“no, if she found out she would definitely tell me to stop!”

“okay okay okay, i won’t tell anyone if that’s what your wondering. we are not done with this conversation though, pete!”

“yes, okay,” peter smiled slightly at you, “thanks for excepting me as spiderman.”

“it’s okay, i love,” when you spoke, peter hoped you would say those three words, he’s been dying to say for the past two months, “being friends with spiderman! so cool!”

peter wanted to cry. of course, you think you’re only friends. all he wanted to do, was kiss you and tell you how much he loved you. but he couldn’t.

“right, i’ve got to go! see you tomorrow spidey!”

“yeah, bye.” peter sulked, once you left, falling onto his bed with his head stuffed in his pillow.

how can it be so hard telling your best friend that he loves you more than a friend?

4.

the fourth time peter wanted to tell you he loved you more than a friend was, mainly due to ned.

you, peter and ned where all at ned’s house, building a lego death star. you where all eating crap, which isn’t abnormal for all of you.

“right i’ll be right back, i need the toilet.” you smiled to them both, before leaving the room.

peter and ned watched you leave, before ned quickly turned to peter as soon as you left the room.

“mate, you gotta tell her!”

peter kind of regrets telling ned how he feels about you, instead of telling well...you. whenever ned gets the chance, he reminds peter on his feelings. it’s not like peter reminds himself 24/7.

“ned, no. she’s said so many times how she views me as a friend.” peter replied, looking away from him to carry on placing lego in the correct places.

“peter...listen to me,” ned spoke, causing peter to meet his eyes before sighing slightly, “if you don’t tell her how you feel, she will soon find someone who will tell her. she will move on. i bet you, actually i know she likes you back. you can just see the love you both feel when your in the same room! it’s disgusting but in a cute way. peter, if you don’t tell her, you’ll loose the chance to.”

“don’t tell who what?” you entered, making peter and ned jump (especially peter.)

you couldn’t of heard everything could you? thoughts where running through peters mind, at what you could of heard. peter sensed that ned was looking at him, forcing him to finally say what he’s been wanting to say for months.

“i-i,” peter was shocked, he couldn’t bare this amount of stress, “i’ve got to go.”

“oh.” you spoke quietly, immediately thinking you said something which upset him. without saying a goodbye, peter left, leaving his best friend and the girl who he loved to much to say.

5.

the fifth time peter wanted to tell you he loved you more than a friend was, when he found out you had a boyfriend.

peter harshly choked on his food in the school canteen, when you said you were going out with brad. peter wanted to scream in pain, anger and sadness. he missed his chance. he wants to shout at ned for what he said two weeks ago about how he will miss his chance. well, ned was right.

“peter? are you okay?”

he wanted to say no. he wanted to say ‘i love you y/n.’ but, he just couldn’t. he sounds so dumb but he physically couldn’t speak.

“yesss, he’s fine. food went down the wrong way.” ned quickly spoke, saving peter from talking. ned felt bad for his best friend, he could see how distraught he was at your news.

“okay. oh, there’s brad! see you guys later!” you smiled at them both, letting your eyes go to peter for longer.

ever since you watched star wars those months ago, you noticed how weirdly peter has been acting around you, but you didn’t know why. was it something you did? is something going on in his life? whatever it is, it’s eating peter from the inside.

once you left, ned immediately looked at peter to see him crying into his hands. he’s never seen peter cry. not even when his uncle died. he didn’t know what to do or how to help his best friend. ned knew, that y/n was peters soulmate, but it was too late.

6.

the one time peter actually told you he loved you was, a moment peter will regret for the rest of his life.

“peter, is y/n with you?”

“no, why?”

“she hasn’t came home.”

peter’s hairs stuck up on the back of his neck, as soon as your mum said those words. he knew something was off. his spider senses were going haywire.

“i’ll call her now mrs l/n.”

“thank you peter, i hope she’s okay.”

he could sense the worry laced within her voice, “me too.”

peter quickly put his suit on, before swinging out the window. he asked his a.i, if she knew were you where, before heading to a location across town, due to karen sensing your heat signature.

a few minutes later, he arrived to a run down building. he quietly swung into a large room, where he noticed a figure sat on a chair in the middle of the room. his breath hitched, when he realised the figure was you. he ran towards you, looking side to side to see if anyone else was here.

“y/n?”

he took in the sight of you. you where clearly beaten, with fresh blood pouring across your body. peter wanted to kill whoever did this to you. you had duck tape across your lips, making your words sound more like muffles.

“oh my god, what happened?” he spoke, carefully taking of the duck tape and untying your hands behind the chair. you suddenly wrapped your arms around peters neck, letting the tears fall while he calmed you.

“c-can we go?”

“gladly.” he replied, before shooting a web to leave.

“not so fast, spidey.”

peter’s tingles went off, when he released who that’s voice belonged to. turning around, he was met with green, wicked eyes.

“greeny! how you doing!” peter spoke, before quickly telling you to hide and to stay there.

“better, now your here! i can finally ruin you. for good.” the green goblin smiled wickedly, before throwing his first punch.

meanwhile, you found a spot behind a cupboard. you were shaking so quickly. why was this happening to you? you’ve had enough stress this past week. you and brad broke up. you failed your test. you and peter haven’t been talking properly, which you didn’t know why.

you looked above the cupboard, to see peter fighting the green goblin. webs and knives where being flown across the room. you where so intrigued, with what peter was doing you didn’t see that the goblin noticed you.

“you took away my world,” the goblin spoke to peter, not loosing eye contact from you, “so i’m going to take away yours.”

peter followed the goblins eyes to you. god, no. not you.

“y/n, run!” peter screeched, before fighting the goblin away from you. but he was faster, and flew towards you, spinning you into his arms.

“goblin, you don’t want to do this. if you do this, i will fucking kill you!”

“ahh good. you know what my weakness is, spiderman? making sure you’re dead, inside and outside.” the goblin replied wickedly, before grabbing one of his spikes, looking at you before stabbing you deep in the chest.

it was as time slowed down for you. the excruciating pain you felt, once he removed the spike overflowed you. you heard peter’s screams, before you where threw onto the ground below the goblins ship.

“bye spidey, i’ll be back.” he spoke, before flying away.

peter quickly took his mask off, running desperately to you. blood was pouring out of your wound, to quickly for peter to handle. his head was spinning. tears fell from his eyes, landing softly onto your bruised neck.

“p-pete...” you spoke softly, whimpering at the pain you felt.

“shhh, it’s o-okay,” he spoke, smiling slighting, moving your soft and dirty hair out of your face, “y-y/n i need to tell you something.”

you met his eyes, crying slightly but waiting for him to continue.

“i-i i love you,” he laughed slightly, glad he finally told you, “more than a friend, i love you so much y/n l/n.”

“i-i love you too p-peter parker.”

peter smiled widely, stroking your cheek slightly before leaning in kissing your lips. it was as fireworks where exploding. the kiss tasted like salt from the tears and blood, but in was filled with pure love and adoration.

peter moved away to meet your eyes smiling slightly. but, his smile soon disappeared when he noticed your eyes were glazed.

“n-no,” peter shook you violently, “wake up! wake up! don’t you dare leave me.”

seconds passed, and you weren’t responding to peter’s desperate calls.

“y-y/n, i can’t live without you.” he whispered into your ear, letting his sobs out.

he told you he loved you. but, it was too late. you have left him, and peter hates himself for it.

“i love you, y/n.” peter spoke to the empty room.

————

a/n - wow okay, this is super sad. i think i cried twice while writing this ahah. if you have any requests comment below or dm me! thanks for reading x

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

* * * *

INTERVIEW: SAINT MISBEHAVIN’ WAVY GRAVY

by Richard Whittaker, Dec 21, 2010

One day I got a note from ServiceSpace founder, Nipun Mehta offering me tickets to a new documentary movie about Wavy Gravy. Would you like to go?

    I went. Although I was aware of Wavy Gravy as a cultural icon, I really knew very little about him. The film is a eye-opener. Michelle Esrick’s loving documentary, Saint Misbehavin’ - 10 years in the making - is a real introduction to this remarkable man. I'd never heard about Hugh Romney, the man who later became famous as Wavy Gravy. And what a story. I'll mention just one of its surprises: earlier in his life, Hugh Romney was Lenny Bruce's manager.

    A few weeks after seeing the film, at Mehta’s urging, I had the chance to interview Wavy Gravy himself.

Richard Whittaker:  How are you feeling about Saint Misbehavin’?

Wavy Gravy:  Oh, it’s a swell movie. I’m honored to be so well-documented, and the review in the New York Times was embarrassing. I’m not that good.

RW:  You said in the film that you’re an “intuitive clown.” Would you mind saying something about what that means?

WG:  I’m trained in the art of acting improvisation. That means acting on the spur of the moment rather than doing, say, the focused slow burn and all the traditional clown moves. I don’t do any of that.

RW:  So that would be about sensing the moment, what’s there, and taking in who you’re with.

WG:  Absolutely—and sensing what’s going on. I was, for a number of years, with The Committee in San Francisco. I taught improvisation at Columbia Pictures. Harrison Ford was one of my students and I’ve taught improvisation at Camp Winnarainbow for over thirty years.

RW:  I wanted to ask you about your history. For instance, in New York in Greenwich Village, you wrote poetry, right?

WG:  Yes I did.

RW:  Is any of it available? And is it something you’d want people to find?

WG:  There are a couple of slender volumes out there. I think you’d have to go to Amazon or eBay to find them. I don’t even have copies myself. But other people do and will lend them to me when I need them.

RW:  Do any titles stand out for you?

WG:  Kaleidoscope and there’s Joe’s Song, which is taught in a poetry class at the University of California at Berkeley. Would you like to hear it?

RW:  Please.

WG:  Okay. It goes like this:  “Once upon and ever since I was a child in a child’s world. I have wept a child’s tears and built a child’s wall of clay and stone and colored years of poems in paint and virgin gold. I sought to build a wall so tall from lion eggs from Gallilee, a brick of song among the dregs of silver nails and lesser men a mile long to kiss the sun and climb again. Once ago and ever now I stood a man on a child’s wall. I stopped and prayed to spider webs and roses of the sea. I spoke as one with all the earth and knew the pain of birth and death to be the same without my wall. Once upon and ever furled I stand alone with all the world.”

RW:  That’s beautiful.

WG:  I wrote it in 1960 or about then. I don’t write lyric poems very often. These days I mainly write haiku, usually when friends pass away, which is happening more and more frequently from natural causes. Also I’ve been having the good fortune to have my art exhibited, and I do a haiku to go with each piece.

RW:  I’m imagining that, as a younger man, you had certain visions and deep feelings that could have been a liability for living the conventional life.

WG:  I don’t think I ever had to contend with that one [laughs]. I live in the land of one thing after another. [speaking with an east Indian accent] “The sand only goes through the hourglass one grain at a time,” as some Hindu sage proclaimed. I’ve discovered that to be true.

RW:  Did you have mentors who supported you in Greenwich Village?

WG:  It was kind of amusing. I was going to theater school at Boston University, which was an amazing theater school. The finest directors in the world would come in and the whole college would read for a part. A freshman could get a lead. It was extraordinary. And if you weren’t cast in the production, you would be cast in the lighting crew or the costume crew or the stage crew. Then there was an upset about theater students not doing their social studies and the university attempted to move the campus of the theater school over to where the rest of the university was laid out. Just at that time, the teachers who had all been hired during the McCarthy blackball because they couldn’t work on Broadway, well, the blackball ended and they all quit. They went to work at the Neighborhood Playhouse in New York City, and they took me with them.

    But while I was at BU, I had read in Time Magazine about jazz and poetry in San Francisco. I thought, hey, I’ve written a couple of poems and I know some musicians. I can do that! So I got together with a bunch of artists from the museum school and we proceeded to take the basement of a bar called The Rock on Huntington Avenue. The place in the basement was called The Pebble in the Rock. We put in black tables and black clothes and mobiles and paintings and began doing jazz and poetry. It was the first jazz and poetry done on the East Coast. So I had the privilege of inaugurating the East Coast to jazz and poetry. I persisted in doing it for years in, of all places, Hartford Connecticut. On every Monday I would grab a bunch of musicians and go to Hartford and make substantial money. Otherwise I was going to the Neighborhood Playhouse and reading my poetry in the evenings at the Gaslight Café in Greenwich Village, as you saw in the movie.

RW:  That’s an amazing story. There was another thing you said in the film, “put your good where it can do the most.”

WG:  Which is the advice I gleaned from one of my mentors, the author and adventurer, Ken Kesey.

RW:  Did that kind of focus something for you?

WG:  Well, it lit up. It lit up. I had discovered that, somewhat. Whenever I would do a good thing, it made me feel good. I think I heard a preacher of color on television in the late fifties. He said, “It’s nice to be nice.” And that kind of hit a chord for me.

RW:  Do you think there’s a mix in what artists do? That in your poetry, part of it was trying to give something?

WG:  Hmmm, I don’t know. I was just trying to get out of the way and let whatever was inside of me come to the surface. In the early days, I was not all that consciously altruistic—although, in the early days of poetry, the poets were not paid. We used to pass a cornucopia around after an hour or so and people would put money in it. We made an embarrassing amount of money that way. Myself and Len Chandler, who was one of the first folk singers I brought into The Gaslight, he and I put on these capes with hoods—Len was an African-American and he had a motor scooter. And we would jump on the motor scooter at the end of the evening and drive down into the Bowery and find somebody passed out on the sidewalk. We’d stuff his pockets with money and drive off and find somebody else until we’d given away at least half of what we’d made in the course of the evening. It was a lot of fun.

RW:  That’s incredible. What do you think led you to do that?

WG:  I don’t know. It just seemed like a fun thing to do. We didn’t need all that money.

RW:  Do you remember the moment when Ken Kesey said “Put your good where it will do the most good”?

WG:  No.  But he told me a lot of stuff—like, “You should honor your mother and your father.” This comes out of the Bible. As soon as I learned that Kesey had written that, I forget how he worded it, I immediately called my mother and my father and honored them verbally as best I could. And it was illuminating for them and for me. Afterwards, I called Ken up to thank him. He said, “Well, it’s just so darn simple.”

RW:  I want to ask about giving and receiving. Do you have any thoughts in general, let’s say, about giving?

WG:  Giving seems to be easy for me. Receiving is the thing I’m just beginning to learn how to do with grace. It’s a work in progress, like the rest of me. Over the last thirty years I’ve experienced considerable physical difficulty, having had to receive a series of spinal surgeries and spending amounts of time in body casts. You have no alternative, or you starve. So it was necessary. I tell people I learned patience in the hospital. [there’s a pause] That’s a pun.

RW:   You’re right! [laughs]

WG:  And as my infirmities persisted, I learned to acquiesce to the moment and accept, with as much graciousness as I could muster, the assistance of people who offered it.

RW:  I bet this is true for lots of people, that it’s easier to give than to receive.

WG:  Right, but as I pointed out, I didn’t have much choice, as with a lot of the stuff that has happened to me in my life. Life situations have presented themselves and it was either sink or swim.

RW:  This reminds me of another part in the film. This is at Woodstock. You and the other members of The Hog Farm were brought there to be the police force for the whole event. You called yourselves “the please force.”

WG:  We were the Please Force. And we had also set up what we called the Trip Tent.

RW:  And there’s a part in the movie where you describe helping a young man who was having a bad acid trip.

WG:  As he came in ranting, this three-hundred pound Australian doctor laid on top of him and said, “Body contact. You need body contact” [said with an accent] and then a psychiatrist leaned in and said, [using another funny voice] “Just think of your third eye, man.”

   Then I figured it was time for me to make my move. I said, “Excuse me. I’d like to try something here.” And they all backed up. What’s this hippie going to do? That’s when I said, “What’s your name, man?”  

RW:  And he mumbled something…

WG:  I said, “No, your name.” He told me his name and I said it back to him. In fact, I said it back to him several times.

RW:  I noticed how very clear and emphatic you were when you got his name. “Okay, Bob. Bob, that’s your name.”

WG:  Your name is Bob.

RW:  Where did you get the knowledge of using that simple directness?

WG:  We’d spent some time on the psychotropic frontiers through the prankster days and beyond. It was not unfamiliar territory.

RW:  You knew something about being really concrete, and focused.

WG:  And through the greatest professor of them all, professor experience; and from courses at hard knocks university.

RW:  You’ve had a lot of hard knocks university experience, I think.

WG:  Yes. Well, that’s how you learn things.

RW:  You said in the film how you’d found you could get high without the psychotropic assistance. Could you say something about that again?

WG:  There are many ways to alter space. I do lots of breathing exercises, and I do mantras. Different people have different recipes to get to a space of consciousness and then to dwell in it for as long as you can, I guess. My own way is an amalgam of many different practices from many different lineages.

RW:  You evolved from Hugh Romney doing the poetry to where you were wearing a jester’s hat.

WG:  Between poems I used to talk about the bizarre things that happened to me during the day because it was really tedious just reading all these poems night after night after night.  Then a guy came along and said, look, skip the poetry. Just talk about your bizarre experiences. That’s how I got into doing stand-up.

    Lenny Bruce became my manager. I put out a couple of albums and toured the U.S. —and in fact, something of the world—doing stand-up before these other things came along.

RW:  Somewhere you left the jester’s hat and started dressing as a clown.

WG:  I was asked, when we had moved to Berkeley in the mid-seventies, to go the Children’s Hospital in Oakland and cheer up kids. On the way out the door of my house, someone handed me a red, rubber nose. I discovered it enabled me to get out of myself and be entertaining to the kids. After awhile, I began to paint my face up as a clown. Somebody gave me a costume, and a clown who was retiring from Ringling Brothers gave me his giant shoes. I worked with kids, with kids who were terminal, even, and did this almost every day for about seven years.

    At one point I had to go to a political rally at Peoples’ Park and I didn’t have time to take off my clown stuff. I discovered that the police didn’t want to hit me anymore. Clowns are safe.

RW:  Can you say more about what your experience at Children’s Hospital working with kids was like?

WG:  I discovered that not only was I helping the kids, I was helping myself. As I began to do this work, I’d gone through three major back surgeries and was in quite a bit of pain. But working with the kids I discovered that as I focused on the children and the pain they were in, I lost track of my own pain.

RW:  Is the clown an archetype you can inhabit?

WG:   Sure.

RW:  Do you think, “I’m a clown?”

WG:  I don’t know. I can’t see you.

RW:  [laughs] No. I have a long way to go. If I evolved, I might become a clown.

WG:  Well, you need to go to camp Winnarainbow. They’ll teach you to clown. It’d be good for you. I think John Townsend said it most brilliantly in The Book of the Clown, “A clown is a poet who is also an orangutan.” But clown comes from the word “clod” or bumpkin, and the red nose indicates they were drunk. But I found all this out later. Suddenly I have these big shoes on and [laughs] a nose and I’m painting my face up, and where does it all come from? I began to study it, and it’s very fascinating, the path of the clown and the jester.

RW:  What have you found out about being a clown? What has been revealed?

WG:  It enables me to go places I couldn’t go as a regular kind of guy. People feel challenged by people going where I go. But when I put on the patina of a clown I’m no challenge to them in any way.

RW:  What do you wish for people when you become a clown?

WG:  I wish that they would find joy in the moment. It’s like I expressed in the film, laughter is the valve on the pressure cooker of life. Either you laugh at stuff or you’re going to end up with your beans on the ceiling.

RW:  At camp Winnarainbow in the film it showed the labyrinth you have on the grounds…

WG:  It’s a unicursal Cretan labyrinth. The oldest one is 3000 years old and was found on the island of Sardinia. The more common labyrinth, like the one you see at Grace Cathedral came about during the 11th or 12th century when Europeans could not go to Jerusalem on pilgrimage. So they developed this other labyrinth, which is different from the Pagan labyrinth, which made it to Scandanavia, to India and somehow to Peru and to the sun temple at Mesa Verde. That’s where I first encountered it when I spent time living with the Hopi Indians for a few months.

RW:  How did that happen?

WG:  I was enamored of the Book of the Hopi by Frank Waters. And that’s where I first saw the labyrinth. According to the Hopi if there was a condition of planetary emergency the different races would gather on this mesa for instruction from the spirit world. So I showed up. They said, “You’re pretty early.” But they took pity on me and I got to hang out with them for a while.

RW:  Was anything given to you?

WG:  Not something that I would feel comfortable talking about, but yes—not so much from the people as from the geography.

RW:  So you brought this labyrinth to camp Winnarainbow, then?

WG:  Yes. I asked Minalanska, who was an elder, what that was. She said, “Oh Wavy Gravy, that’s just the master plan of the universe.” So I borrowed a pencil and wrote it down, and I’ve brought it everywhere I’ve gone ever since. I learned to draw it. Even with my first book, I’d sign it and draw that labyrinth.

RW:  Now how do you make use of the labyrinth at camp for the kids?

WG:  A teepee at a time, in the evening, the campers get to walk the labyrinth to beautiful music under the stars. If they do good things, they get strokes. If they do bad things they get strikes. Three strikes and you’re out. You can always work off strikes, but you can get enough strikes to be sent home, too. By doing things above and beyond the ordinary camper—for instance, if you get eight stokes in a two-week session, you get to walk into the center of the labyrinth. In the center, there’s also these crystals. You get to take a crystal out of the labyrinth and take it home.

RW:  Do you talk to the kids about the labyrinth?

WG:  Oh, sure.

RW:  What do you tell them?

WG:  I tell them that the labyrinth is not a maze. Mazes are designed to get you lost. Labyrinths are designed to get you found. And I ask them to think of each step as a prayer for peace. I tell them you go into the labyrinth and that there’s an energy in the center that I call the spirit of Gaia, the earth mother. I say that if you have cares or problems you can leave them in the labyrinth and come out perhaps lighter than when you went in. And that is sometimes helpful to young people.

RW:  In the film you made a comment to one kid that the labyrinth is inside of you.

WG:  Oh, I tell all the kids that. The true labyrinth is inside you.

RW:  That’s powerful. From the film, I see that your life has been a journey. Do you feel it that way?

WG:  Absolutely. It’s been a great adventure.

RW:  What are some of the changes from where you were and where you are today?

WG:  The things that are the most significant for me in my life are the circus and performing arts camp that I’ve run with my wife Jahanara for over thirty years. We do nine weeks for kids and one week for grown-ups. And the Seva Foundation is another. Through it I’m able to raise funds to help the blind regain their sight. Eighty percent of the blind people in the world don’t need to be—they can get their sight back.

    When we first started doing the work it was about five dollars for a cataract operation. Now it’s close to fifty dollars for the operation in third world countries. If you go to SEVA.org you can find out all about us. We’ve helped to orchestrate—it’s going on three million sight-saving operations. I get to put on concerts to raise funds to do that. I’m going to be seventy-five years old in May and I’m looking forward to doing a concert in the Bay Area at the Craneway Pavillion in Richmond and in New York City at the Beacon Theater. And also I’m facing another basic spinal surgery in January. So I’ve got a lot of stuff on my plate.

RW:  I know we don’t have much more time, but …

WG:  Eternity now, I always say.  That’s one of my favorite quotes. And we’re all the same person trying to shakes hands with our self. I think that’s a good one, too.

RW:  I like those quotes. It’s clear that you’ve spent a lot of time doing forms of service. Camp Winnarainbow seems to be a service.

WG:  Well, my greatest legacy is the children that have come out of camp over the last thirty years. Lots of the kids who started camp when they were seven are now running the camp. And I’m sure it will go on long after I’m gone.

RW:  Is that something one begins to learn, that the deepest gifts come when one can look beyond personal wants to take in the needs of others?

WG:  That is my want! [laughs] Put your good where it will do the most. I can’t say it any better.

[WORKS AND CONVERSATIONS]

[rbbalmung]

Pokemon SwSh GPL AU: Get to know _____

I mentioned yesterday that I would go more into why I like Bea and Bede as a pair, and this is how I’ll do it! Quick notes for newcomers: I’ve aged up the main cast a bit so instead of being 10-12, they’re 16-17 (as an adult, I cannot fathom a 10 year old living on their own for a year). I head cannon Bede as 17 and Bea as 18, so they’re only about a year apart in age. I think I’m gonna call them Pinkpunchshipping? Thoughts? I’m open to workshopping the name. 

Original prompt by some-imaginative-otp-imagines: 

Get to Know Bea x Bede (Ship name still being determined): 

1: Who spends almost all their money on the other? Bede. 100% Bede. I don’t see Bea as someone who would show affection through gifts, but Bede is the complete opposite. He is constantly bringing her little sweets as pick-me-ups.  

2: Who sleeps in the other’s lap? Bede will sleep with his head in Bea’s lap all the time. It’s hard not to nod off when she’s playing with his fluffy head of hair. 

3: Who walks around the house half-naked and who yells at them to put on some clothes? Bea, probably, but not in a seductive way? She works out a lot, so it is common for her to come home after a long workout and immediately get out of her sweaty clothes. Bede doesn’t yell at her because he gets too flustered whenever it happens (how these two got together in the first place is a mystery to everyone). 

4: Which one tells the other not to stay up all night and which one stays up all night anyway? Bea is a morning person and Bede is a night person. They’ve tried to adjust it so that they wake up and go to bed together but gave up after an irritable week. As long as Bede is around when Bea goes to sleep and Bea doesn’t wake him up at the crack of dawn, they’re good. 

5: Which one tries to make food for the other but burns it all by accident and which one tells them that it’s okay and makes them both cookies? Bea can cook one thing and it is ramen. They are damn lucky that Opal forced Bede to learn how to cook, otherwise it would be takeout every night. 

6: Which one reads OTP prompts and says “Oh that’s us!” and which one goes “Eh, not really”? Neither. Bea is a realist and Bede is an individualist that doesn’t like being compared to other people. 

7: Which one constantly wears the other’s clothes? On stay-at-home days, Bede will borrow one of Bea’s oversized hoodies to wear (his sense of fashion means he gives up comfort for beauty, so he owns next to no sweats). Bea thinks it’s adorable and teases him all the time for it. 

8: Which one spends all day running errands and which one says “You remembered [thing], right?” Okay, stick with me on this one. I think that they almost always do errands together because, early in their relationship, they would always buy the wrong thing for the other. Going shopping together started as something they had to do as a pair, but now I think it’s just a lowkey way to spend time together. 

9: Which one drives the car and which one gives them directions? Bea would drive, Bede would give directions. She is better at staying focused for long periods of time and he’s better at planning ahead. 

10: Which one does the posing while the other one draws? Bea would definitely draw Bede. Bea picked up sketching to de-stress from Honey, so it is incredibly likely that Bede would be an eventual model for her (it’s not like she starts sketching him constantly when she recognises her feelings for him and nearly bursts into flames when he finds her sketchbook. That would be silly). 

11: If they were about to rob a museum, which one does backflips through lasers and which one is strolling behind with a bag of chips? My first thought was that obviously Bea would be the backflipper, but the more I thought about it, the more I realised Bede would be the backflipper. He is so freaking extra about everything. OF COURSE he would try to show off. 

12: Which one of your OTP overdoes it on the alcohol and which one makes the other stop drinking? Bede is a casual drinker, so his tolerance is pretty high. Bea hardly drinks, so it only takes her about 2 shots to get drunk. Bede tries to get her to take it easy, but if someone (like Raihan) challenges her, she will not back down. There hasn’t been a New Years Eve party that Bede hasn’t carried Bea home. 

14: Which one keeps accidentally using the other’s last name instead of their own? Bea. It takes separation and a lot of long talks for her to realise that her home life was very toxic. The only reason she decides to take Bede’s last name when they get married is to spite her parents. 

15: Which one screams about the spider and which one brings the spider outside? Bede 100% is freaked out by bug pokemon, but he tries to play if off like he isn’t scared.  

16: Which one gives the other their jacket? I feel like it depends on the situation. Space Heater Bea is never cold, so if it’s chilly, Bede is the one getting the jacket. However, Bede will give Bea his jacket as a form of comfort if he senses something is off.  

17: Who keeps getting threatened by the other’s overprotective older sibling (or a similar figure)? Bea is very intimidated by Opal. They are complete opposites when it comes to personality other than their shared competitiveness. Bea is convinced that Opal hates her (Opal actually really likes Bea, she just would rather die than tell her that). 

18: Who’s the first one to admit they have feelings for the other? Oh my god, when I say it took forever for one of them to confess, I mean three whole years of hopeless pining. Neither of them are good at talking about their feelings, so they’ll try to find subtle ways to confess to the other. Unfortunately, they are also as dense as each other when it comes to romance. I think Bede would eventually get so frustrated that he blurts it out, then immediately tries to take it back. Thankfully, Bea was too stubborn to let him. 

19: How good would your OTP be at parenting? Terrible. Absolutely terrible. I think they would definitely try their hardest if it ever happened, but I also don’t really see them having children? 

20: Which one types with perfect grammar and which one types using numbers as letters? Bede = Perfect Grammar. Extra dramatic. Will call someone out if they send him a spelling error. Bea = short, chaotic sentence fragments. Bede tried calling her out on it once but she shut him down real fast. 

21: Who gets attacked by a bully and who protects them? They are both SUPER protective people, so I like to think they take turns. Bea tends to scare them off by fighting them, and Bede destroys people with his words. 

22: Who makes the bad puns and who makes a pained smile every time the other makes a pun? Bede has definitely picked up some dramatics from Opal’s training. Whenever the occasional “pink” pun slips into his sentences, Bea has to try very hard not to comment on it. 

23: Who comes home from work to see that the other one bought a puppy? If Bea finds a stray pokemon, she will hold onto it until it can be returned to its owner. She also catches a lot more fighting pokemon than she will every need and goes camping with them once a week. 6 pokemon Bede cannot relate.   

24: Which one gives the other a piggyback ride when they’re tired? Oh my gosh, neither. It’s not that they wouldn’t give the other a piggy back: Both are too prideful to ask for one, so they mostly just end up leaning heavily on the other until they return home. 

25: Which one competes in some sort of activity and which one does the overzealous cheering? Bea gets waaayy to into Bede’s pokemon matches. She will scream at the TV (or from the audience if she is in Ballonlea that day) until she is hoarse. Bede gets really embarrassed, but it's because he’s flattered. 

26: Who takes a selfie when the other one falls asleep on their shoulder? Bede. I mentioned earlier that Bea falls asleep faster than Bede (unless his head is on her lap), so he has a secret folder of photos on his phone with the two of them cuddling together. Bea knows he has this folder and will get incredibly flustered if it’s brought up. 

27: Which one would give the other a makeover if they asked? BEDE. He wants nothing more than to give his sporty girlfriend a high fashion makeover. Bede thinks she’s beautiful, of course, but he just wants to see what it would look like. One year on his birthday, she humors him and he is BUZZING WITH EXCITEMENT.

28: Which one owns a pet that the other is absolutely terrified of? Bede is super intimidated by some of Bea’s pokemon. (Bea is intimidated by his type advantage against her, but that’s different). 

29: Which one holds the umbrella over both of them when it rains? Bede. He’s taller and insists on being a gentleman. 

30: If your OTP went on vacation, where would they go and what would they do? Who would take the pictures? I feel like they would go to Kalos. Bede would insist they visit the boutiques while Bea made sure they hiked in the mountains. Bede would take the pictures, but Bea would sketch a lot.